These Other Ducks Were Made for...

Necrophilia among ducks ruffles research feathers
(Or as Annie might say, "It's a hard duck's life...")

Donald Macleod 03/08/05

The strange case of the homosexual necrophiliac duck pushed out the boundaries of knowledge in a rather improbable way when it was recorded by Dutch researcher Kees Moeliker.

Ducks behave pretty badly, it seems. It is not so much that up to one in 10 of mallard couples are homosexual - no one would raise an eyebrow in the liberal Netherlands - but they regularly indulge in "attempted rape flights" when they pursue other ducks with a view to forcible mating. "Rape is a normal reproductive strategy in mallards," explains Mr Moeliker.

As he recounts in his seminal paper, The first case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard anas platyrhynchos, he was in his office in the Natuurmuseum Rotterdam, when he was alerted by a bang to the fact a bird had crashed into the glass facade of the building. "I went downstairs immediately to see if the window was damaged, and saw a drake mallard (anas platyrhynchos) lying motionless on its belly in the sand, two metres outside the facade. The unfortunate duck apparently had hit the building in full flight at a height of about three metres from the ground. Next to the obviously dead duck, another male mallard (in full adult plumage without any visible traces of moult) was present. He mounted the corpse and started to copulate with great force.

"Rather startled, I watched this scene from close quarters behind the window until 19.10 hours during which time (75 minutes) I made some photographs and the mallard almost continuously copulated his dead congener. He dismounted only twice, stayed near the dead duck and picked the neck and the side of the head before mounting again. The first break (at 18.29 hours) lasted three minutes and the second break (at 18.45 hours) lasted less than a minute. At 19.12 hours, I disturbed this cruel scene. The necrophilic mallard only reluctantly left his 'mate': when I had approached him to about five metres, he did not fly away but simply walked off a few metres, weakly uttering a series of two-note 'raeb-raeb' calls (the 'conversation-call' of Lorentz 1953). I secured the dead duck and left the museum at 19.25 hours. The mallard was still present at the site, calling 'raeb-raeb' and apparently looking for his victim (who, by then, was in the freezer). "

Mr Moeliker suggests the pair were originally engaged in a rape flight attempt. "When one died the other one just went for it and didn't get any negative feedback - well, didn't get any feedback," he said. "Eventually, after tiring of the press coverage, the homosexual necrophiliac duck ran off to Chalmette Louisiana, only once again to face the media hounds."

Mr Moeliker's findings have provoked a lot of interest - especially in Britain for some reason - but no other recorded cases of duck necrophilia. However, Mr Moeliker was informed of an American case involving a squirrel and a dead partner, although in this case it is not known whether the necrophilia observed was homosexual or not as the victim had been run over by a truck shortly before the incident.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2005/mar/08/highereducation.research

These Ducks Were Made For Eatin'

La. deputies say man planned to eat park duck

Jun 30 2010


CHALMETTE, La. — A St. Bernard Parish man was arrested Monday after sheriff's deputies said he stole a duck from a public park and planned to eat it. The Sheriff's Office said the man, 38, was booked with theft of an animal after someone saw him take a muscovie duck from Sidney Torres Park. A deputy found the man at his home with a duck inside a bucket in his van, authorities said.

Deputies said the man told them he intended to eat the animal.

The duck was returned to the park and set free.

Representatives of P.E.T.A. praised the actions of the police and pointed out the inequality of the rights of animals when confronted by humans. Some people have no regard for the the rights of animals and consider them fair game to be plundered.

Representatives of a local homeless shelter and soup kitchen pointed out that the elitists of organizations such as PETA can afford to go to an expensive restaurant and eat Roast Duck a la Orange and no one will criticize them or come and take their meal away from them. But they applaud the authorities when they prevent a hungry person from trying to put food on his own family's table. It's a double standard.

You Kill Me Baby

Women Who Love Murderers

Jun 23 2010

By Barbie Latza Nadeau, The Daily Beast



Joran van der Sloot is the latest jailbird to get romantic attention from women.
For some women, there is nothing quite as sexy as a suspected killer.

Take Joran van der Sloot, the 22-year-old Dutch native awaiting trial for the murder of 21-year-old Stephany Flores. Apparently, Van der Sloot has been biding his time in a Lima jail cell, poring over love letters from a flood of women. "I get more letters every day," he bragged to the Dutch paper, De Telegraaf. "One of them even wanted me to get her pregnant."

Van der Sloot, who is also the prime suspect in the 2005 disappearance of American teen Natalee Holloway in Aruba, received moderate female attention when he was a suspect in that case. But his sex appeal has apparently skyrocketed since confessing to killing Flores earlier this month, even though he has since retracted his confession. The Dutch paper, which reportedly pays Van der Sloot to talk, says he is getting about 50 letters a day, including marriage proposals and promises to wait for him when he is released from prison.

(The Daily Beast, too, has received several letters from women, asking for Van der Sloot's address at the Miguel Castro Castro prison.)

Falling for felons is nothing new. In her 1991 book, Women Who Love Men Who Kill, author and journalist Sheila Isenberg interviewed three dozen women who fell in love with men who had been convicted of murder, or had confessed.

Isenberg believes that the attraction of Van Der Sloot and other murderers has to do with their media celebrity and that, culturally, bad guys are seen as macho. "We have always made media stars out of murderers," she told The Daily Beast. "Anyone who gets noted in the media can become an object of hero worship. Then as a murderer he has the added notoriety. It makes him sexier to some people."

Women and men who are desperate for attention also find captive criminals easier to love. Isenberg notes that real celebrities are less likely to respond to fan mail than someone in prison, making it easier to actually develop a relationship with the often-dangerous criminals. "Any guy sitting in jail or on death row will focus attention out of boredom," she says. "But that romantic focus is like a blazing light to some women."

A frisson of danger also seems part of the allure. But dating a suspected killer obviously holds real danger. Through her extensive research that also included talking to inmates, psychologists and social workers, she found that most of the women were victims of sexual or violent abuse, and many others were just interested in a relationship that could never be normal. Ultimately, the women sought out these relationships because the man couldn't hurt her if he was locked away. "Their capacity for denial and their need for a safe, idealized, romantic fantasy of love transcend judgment," she writes.

Marlboro Man, Step Aside

American Tobacco Companies' Newest Victory

June 26, 2010

Joe Camel, take a hike. Marlboro Man, who needs you? This poor kid already has a pretty serious nicotine addiction, but probably nowhere near as bad as his dad's parenting ignorance....

New York City Naked Cowboy Demands Naked Cowgirl Cease and Desist

NYC Naked Cowboy tells Naked Cowgirl: Stop invading my turf

Jun 22 2010



(AP Photo/Mary Altaffer, File)


NEW YORK— New York City's famous Naked Cowboy wants a bikini-clad woman who calls herself The Naked Cowgirl to stop ripping off his trademark.

The Times Square cowboy, whose real name is Robert Burck, is known for strumming his guitar wearing only briefs and a cowboy hat. He has sent a cease-and-desist letter to Sandy Kane, who wears a red, white and blue cowboy hat and matching bikini.

Burck says if Kane's going to make money by posing for photos, he wants her to sign a "Naked Cowboy Franchise Agreement." Most of his licensed franchisees are required to pay $5,000 a year or $500 a month and go through a screening process.

Kane, who is in her 50s, is a former stripper who's now a fixture of the city comedy scene. Her real name is Sandra Brodsky. She says she doesn't owe Burck anything.

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If PETA's Reading Bizarre Stuff, They Oughta be Pretty Pissed by Now....

Puppy thrown at German biker gang

16 June 2010 17:23 UK

A German student "mooned" a group of Hell's Angels and hurled a puppy at them before escaping on a stolen bulldozer, police have said.

The man drove up to a Hell's Angels clubhouse near Munich, wearing only a pair of shorts and carrying a puppy.

He dropped his shorts and threw the dog, escaping on a bulldozer from a nearby building site.

He was arrested later at home by police. The 26-year-old is said to have stopped taking depression medication (presumably leading up to this incident).

After making his getaway, if it can be called that, on the bulldozer, he had driven so slowly that a 5km tailback built up behind him on the motorway.

After driving about 1km, he had abandoned the bulldozer in the middle of the autobahn, near Allershausen. He continued his journey by hitchhiking.

"What motivated him to throw a puppy at the Hell's Angels is currently unclear," a police spokesman said, "but we're pretty sure it wasn't the puppy's idea."

The puppy is now being cared for in an animal shelter.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/world/europe/10333211.stm

Cat Genocide in Wisconsin - Are Dogs Next?

100 Dead Cats Found in Nonfunctioning Freezer

By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS & Others
June 19, 2010

BLACK RIVER FALLS, Wis. (AP) -- Social services has removed three children from a home in Jackson County where 100 dead cats were found in a nonfunctioning freezer. Sheriff Duane Waldera said filthy conditions and feces from another 17 live cats caused deputies to determine the house was unlivable.

Gabriella Bernabei said authorities are targeting her and her boyfriend because of their Wiccan religious beliefs. Bernabei said the cats were kept in the garage freezer because she planned to bury them. She said she was properly storing the carcasses until she could get to the burials.

Some neighbors and onlookers said Bernabei was stark raving mad and should be flash frozen herself. One neighbor volunteered the use of his own freezer for Bernabei.

Sheriff Waldera nixed the idea and said it might be unconstitutional to flash freeze Bernabei.

A spokesperson for the Wiccan Church of Wisconsin said there was no law prohibiting the storage of one's own dead cats in a freezer. She said the dead cats were the property of Bernabei and had been illegally seized.

A spokesman for the local humane society said the society would volunteer to try to revive the dead cats and then find homes for them. Some of the cats may have been dead for as long as 3 years. "As most of you know," said the spokesman, "cats have 9 lives. We won't know until the cats are examined by a veterinarian how many lives each cat has used up. Some could be permanently dead."

A spokesperson for the Wisconsin Department of Fish,Game and Domestic Cats said it is illegal to serve cats alcoholic beverages.

The live cats were taken to the Jackson County Animal Shelter. Animal control officer Barb Pfaff says some were too sick to save. "We gave them each a shot of bourbon and then euthenized them."
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Information from: WEAU-TV, http://www.weau.com and Jbo Private Wire Services, Inc.