Sexiest Man Alive?

Somewhere in the Far East  (Mysterious)
Nov. 28, 2012


BEIJING (AP) — The online version of China's Communist Party newspaper has hailed a report by The Onion naming North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un as the "Sexiest Man Alive" — apparently unaware it is satire.
The People's Daily ran a 55-page photo spread on its website Tuesday in a tribute to the moon-faced leader, under the headline "North Korea's top leader named The Onion's Sexiest Man Alive for 2012."
Quoting The Onion's spoof report, the Chinese newspaper wrote, "With his devastatingly handsome, round face, his boyish charm, and his strong, sturdy frame, this Pyongyang-bred heartthrob is every woman's dream come true."

"Blessed with an air of power that masks an unmistakable cute, cuddly side, Kim made this newspaper's editorial board swoon with his impeccable fashion sense, chic short hairstyle, and, of course, that famous smile," the People's Daily cited The Onion as saying.
The photos the People's Daily selected include Kim on horseback squinting into the light and Kim waving toward a military parade. In other photos, he is wearing sunglasses and smiling, or touring a facility with his wife.

An online editor for the People's Daily said Wednesday that the photo spread would be taken offline.
"We have realized it is satirical," said the editor who works on the site's South Korea channel, one of the three channels where it was posted. He refused to give his name. When asked whether editors knew the Onion piece was satirical when the People's Daily item was first posted, he declined to clarify, but added that they picked up the news after first seeing it on China's state-run Guangming Daily website.
He said that he hoped the incident wouldn't draw too much attention.


Once the Chinese major news outlet fell for the satirical article in the U.S. magazine, The Onion, that named North Korea's chubby, baby-faced dictator, Kim Jong un, as the "sexiest man alive," The North Korean press immediately picked up the story and ran a major, multi-paged article extolling the manly virtues and overall good looks of the pudgy, moon-faced Kim, also unaware of the satirical nature of the Onion spoof.  Kim Jong un's equally un glamorous wife, Ri Sol Ju (plus or minus 30 pounds) is shown accompanying him on a state visit to a people's pleasure park.

BizarreStuff is conducting its own independent poll to find out how many of our readers agree that Kim Jong un is the "sexiest man alive?"  You can answer 'yes' or 'no' as an anonymous commentator at the end of the story.

Thanks for your participation.

The Editor

BizarreStuff

Drop-In Cleaning Service - No Appointment Required

Ohio's 'cleaning fairy' gets 1 year of probation

Nov 26 2012 

CLEVELAND (AP) — An Ohio woman dubbed the "cleaning fairy" after she broke into a home, cleaned it and left a $75 bill has been put on probation for one year.

A judge sentenced 53-year-old Susan Warren of Elyria (eh-LEER'-ee-uh) on Monday in Cleveland on her guilty plea to attempted burglary. She also must do 20 hours of community service. (cleaning houses?)

The woman told authorities she was driving by the Westlake house and "wanted something to do." She broke in, washed some coffee cups, took out the trash, vacuumed and dusted inside the house. Then she left a bill written on a napkin and included her phone number.

Warren says she owns a cleaning business and sometimes enters homes, cleans them and leaves a bill.

Odd Bodies

At what point do you become too big? At what point do you become an oddity, deformed not by genetics but because of your own choice?  People look at you as if you were not real. Unfortunately there is a fine line between a ripped Arnold (from the 70′s) body and becoming obsessed. These are the dudes who took it that extra step. Read more at http://regretfulmorning.com/2012/09/insane-body-builders-8-pics/#D3RVH7zHDKZLshsL.99 

Not to be outdone are the women who strive for the "wasp waist" look.  A waist trained to be 15" (her actual waist size) by always wearing a tight belt produces an odd look much like the dude with the super shoulders and chest.

The UnVatican  11/26/2012
Italy

A spokesperson for the Vatican who was unauthorized to speak said the recent decision to dispose of 2 tons of pigeon poop discovered in the open tower of a church in Germany is being reconsidered in light of the commercial value of the pigeons' deposits of poop for over a period of approximately 3 decades.

The guano, as it is known commercially, is excellent fertilizer.  However, the unauthorized spokesperson said a plan to package the poop in 4 ounce packages, to be sold by Vatican, Inc, would increase revenue from the sale of the guano by 20 times, once it had been officially blessed.  The issue is whether or not the Holy See would approve of such crass commercialism.  Holy Water is one thing: Holy Crap is something entirely different.

Sanitation and clean water can be more easily managed.  Bags of pigeon poop are more easily lost or discarded, or mistakenly thought to be marijuana and smoked by teenagers.

MOM PICKS WRONG STEPDAD

Teen accused of killing his stepfather with sword

Nov 26 2012 

JASPER, Ga. (AP) — Authorities in north Georgia say a 16-year-old boy is expected to make his first court appearance Monday after he was accused of killing his stepfather with a sword.
Pickens County sheriff's Lt. Kris Stancil says a relative of the teen called 911 Friday night to report the stabbing.
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution (http://bit.ly/RbN5tD ) reports that it happened at a home inside a gated community in the Jasper area. Jasper is about 60 miles northwest of Atlanta.
Deputies say they found 36-year-old Christopher Allen inside the home. Stancil said he was taken to WellStar Kennestone Hospital in Marietta, where he died during emergency surgery.
Pickens County Sheriff Donnie Griggs says investigators believe the teen stabbed his stepfather with a Samurai-style sword following an argument.

Not the actual sword.

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REACTIONS:

Poopville, California

SAN DIEGO — Come here for the sights. (There is not a more majestic spot to watch the sun set over the Pacific.) Or come for the sounds. (The waves crash against the rocks, and the sea lions bark at one another on the bluffs.)

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With Droppings a Problem, La Jolla Cove Fears for Business

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Sam Hodgson for The New York Times

Hagan Smith, 5, and Hyrum Brinton, 4, tried to block the smell last week in La Jolla Cove, a postcard-worthy neighborhood of San Diego, except for the bird feces. More Photos »

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Sam Hodgson for The New York Times

Since the coastal rocks were closed off to people because of safety concerns, birds and sea lions have taken over. More Photos »

But don’t come for the odor.

“It’s so bad, it’s so bad,” said Neda Long, a tourist from Tennessee. “As soon as we pulled up, it was like, this is awful.”

In beautiful La Jolla Cove, art galleries and coffee shops meet a stretch of unspoiled cliffs and Pacific Ocean.Home to former presidential candidates (Mitt Romney has been spotted pumping his own gas here in recent days) and seal colonies alike, the neighborhood provides one of this city’s primary tourist draws.

But the smell, a pungent stench that emanates from the accumulation of bird feces on the rocks, has become a growing problem. And strict environmental regulations in the cove have stymied the city’s efforts to address the problem before it drives tourists and businesses away, effectively roping the rocks off with red tape.

“I’ve lived here my whole life, and the smell from the birds has never, ever been as bad as it is now,” said Megan Heine, the owner of Brockton Villa Restaurant, which overlooks the cove from a historic building that has been on the cliffs for more than 100 years. She said guests asked about the stench so frequently that her wait staff had become adept at explaining its cause.

“If nothing is done and the smell becomes unbearable, I’m fearful of what that will really do to the business and the appeal of being in La Jolla,” she said.

Until a few years ago, the smell was never a problem because the bluffs were open for people to walk on. But since the rocks were closed off, partly because of safety concerns, sea gulls and cormorants have taken over, their droppings have piled up and the smell has grown more acrid by the day.

In theory, a solution could be simple. Sherri Lightner, the local City Council member, said there were biodegradable and nontoxic cleaning agents that could be safely used to clean the bluffs occasionally without any ill effects to the environment.

However, because the waters in the cove are part of a coastal area specially protected by the state, multiple state regulatory agencies would have to issue permits before the agents could be used, a process that regulators have indicated would probably take at least two years.

“We tried to investigate this as an emergency request, but it hasn’t risen to the level of something like a hazardous spill, where they address it right away,” Ms. Lightner said. “We don’t get to have special regulations for bird poop.”

So this month, Ms. Lightner wrote a letter to Gov. Jerry Brown, hoping to expedite the process before the festering odor starts to take a heavier toll on businesses.

“La Jolla finds itself caught in a morass of state regulations — and it stinks. Literally,” Ms. Lightner wrote in the letter. “This issue has implications not just for La Jolla and San Diego but also for the State of California. Quite simply, it proves that California’s regulations make it an impossible place to do business.”

Just how bad the smell is is a matter of personal olfactory perception. Everyone agrees that it is worst in the hot summer months. Even on a cool November day, though, the smell was noticeable inside ocean-facing rooms at local hotels and half a mile inland in the commercial center.

To Ms. Lightner, it just smells like the ocean, but maybe a little “heightened.” Others pinch their noses as they walk by. The environmentalist who sells T-shirts here said customers never complained about it. But to local restaurant owners, it smells like a threat to their livelihoods.

Ms. Long from Tennessee, covering her nose with a scarf as she walked around the cove, said she would not eat at any of the restaurants right on the water or stay in the hotels there (and next time, she plans to park her car more strategically, away from the rocks where the birds and seals congregate).

But others were undaunted and considered the smell the price of admission for getting to see wildlife up close.

“It’s not so bad,” said Bella Blyumin, who was visiting from Cleveland with her husband and daughter. “You can kind of handle it. As long as you know it’s natural, you can appreciate it when you see the scenery.”

Some residents hope the cliffs will remain untouched, left to the birds and the seals, which will produce, well, the kinds of smells that birds and sea lions produce.

For the moment anyway, there seems to be little city officials can do except hope for winter rainstorms, which in years past have washed the rocks and alleviated some of the smell.

“We need to consider a range of alternatives for cleaning the rocks, and one of those could be no project, just sit and wait for rain,” said Kanani Brown, an analyst for the California Coastal Commission, one of the regulatory agencies. “I know that’s not ideal for local businesses, but that’s historically been the approach.”

Hey man,,,that's a 51" flat screen,,,toddler v. 51" flat screen?

Cops: Mass. bargain hunter took home TV, left toddler in parking lot

Nov 23 2012 

SPRINGFIELD, Mass. (AP) — Police say a Massachusetts man left his girlfriend's 2-year-old son in a car while he went shopping for Black Friday bargains, then went home with his new 51-inch flat screen television and left the toddler in the KMart parking lot.

Police, alerted by store security, found the boy asleep in the vehicle in a Kmart parking lot at about 1:30 a.m. Friday.
They forced their way into the car and took the boy to the hospital as a precaution.
Meanwhile, they tracked the man to his Springfield home.
He told police he lost the boy while shopping, panicked and called someone else for a ride. The boy's mother was working.
The 34-year-old man was not arrested and not immediately charged, but police say they expect to charge him with reckless endangerment to a child.