Husband Cleared in Wife's Death - Moose is Held as Prime Suspect

Police: moose now suspect in death of Swedish woman

Nov 29 2009


STOCKHOLM— Swedish police say they've cleared a man who was arrested for allegedly murdering his wife after deciding the culprit was most likely a moose.

Police spokesman Ulf Karlsson says "the improbable has become probable" in the puzzling death last year of 63-year old Agneta Westlund. She was found dead after an evening stroll in the forest.

According to news reports, the victim's husband, Ingemar Westlund, was jailed for 10 days. The case against him was dropped in January.

Karlsson declined to give details of the case Saturday, saying a news conference would be held Tuesday.

The tabloid Expressen says hairs and saliva from a moose _ aka a European elk _ were found on the victim's clothes. Police would not immediately confirm that.

Police arrested a moose near the area where the woman's body was found, near a moose crossing. The moose was being held at a local animal farm pending completion of the investigation. It is not clear if the moose will be charged if DNA tests on the saliva and hairs found on the woman's clothing match DNA obtained from a sample of the suspected moose's fur and saliva.

The moose's court appointed attorney said her client will not have a statement to make, now or ever. "The moose is innocent until proven guilty," she said.

Siamese Models Appear in Fashion Show

Nov 29, 2009

Models joined at the breast

Twins, conjoined at the breast, demonstrate how they wear a bra at a fashion show in Tierra del Fuego, Argentina.

In a wide-ranging interview with reporters, the women, both of whom have been married twice, spoke about the psychological adjustments necessary for their men when they have sex with their wife. Unless you are careful you can end up having sex with your wife's sister. Since the women share a common vagina it can create problems when both couples want to make love at the same time.

Brits To Have Opportunity to Get Falling Down Drunk on Beer

'World's strongest' beer with 32% strength launched

James Watt, pictured here, said Tactical Nuclear Penguin would sell for £30

A controversial Scottish brewery has launched what it described as the world's strongest beer - with a 32% alcohol content.

Tactical Nuclear Penguin has been unveiled by BrewDog of Fraserburgh.

BrewDog was previously branded irresponsible for an 18.2% beer called Tokyo, which it then followed with a low alcohol beer called Nanny State.

Managing director James Watt said a limited supply of Tactical Nuclear Penguin would be sold for £30 each.

"This is an extremely strong beer; it should be enjoyed in small servings and with an air of aristocratic nonchalance"
*Tactical Nuclear Penguin label warning*

He said: "This beer is about pushing the boundaries, it is about taking innovation in beer to a whole new level." It is about getting more drunk to the pound, and gaining more pounds to the drunk.

Mr Watt added that a beer such as Tactical Nuclear Penguin should be drunk in "spirit sized measures".

A warning on the label states: "This is an extremely strong beer; it should be enjoyed in small servings and with an air of aristocratic nonchalance. In exactly the same manner that you would enjoy a fine whisky, a Frank Zappa album or a visit from a friendly yet anxious ghost."

However Jack Law, of Alcohol Focus Scotland, described it as a "cynical marketing ploy" and said: "We want to know why a brewer would produce a beer almost as strong as whisky." Mr. Watt said in response: "Why would a whiskey maker produce a whiskey that is even stronger than beer? Is there some immutable law that decrees whiskey must always contain more alcohol than beer?"

Privately, Mr. Law admitted to some close friends, who asked to remain synonymous, that he was upset because he hadn't thought of the idea first. "The only reason any maker of alcoholic beverages makes them is to permit its customers to anesthetize their brains for a few hours, as a means of relaxing and losing all inhibitions about cheating on their spouses. If this beer can do it quicker and cheaper it's got a great future."

The beer has been launched on the day alcohol was at the top of the political agenda with the unveiling of the Scottish government's Alcohol Bill including proposals for minimum pricing on drink.

Meanwhile, BrewDog's plans for a new headquarters to produce millions of bottles of beer a year have been approved by Aberdeenshire Council.

The decision was taken at a full council meeting despite having been recommended for refusal by officers because the site at Potterton, near Aberdeen, is in the green belt. "Greenbelt, schreembelt, said a council member who refused to give his name, this will bring in sufficient new tax revenue to reduce everyone's taxes, and council members get free beer for life. Heck of a deal."

Very Skinny Woman Loses Weight Loss Contest To Sri Lankan Woman

Woman so skinny she can't find clothes to fit in Florida

November 26, 2009
Coral Gables, Fla.

A Florida woman who entered a weight loss contest to try to win a trip to the Canary Islands, lost the contest when she was beaten by a woman from Sri Lanka. The woman, shown above, who did not want to be identified, told reporters she had lost 226 pounds in less than one year but the Sri Lankan woman had lost 240 pounds. No photos were available of the Sri Lankan winner who died just after the contest results were announced, from severe dehydration and starvation. Essentially, her principal organs just stopped functioning.

The losing Florida woman had a Thanksgiving feast to celebrate going off her 300 calorie a day diet. She ate only lettuce, cucumbers and celery stalks for most of the year she was dieting. She told reporters she had no regrets except men did not notice her any longer because her breasts had shrunk. During the year of dieting she underwent breast implant surgery to correct the problem but says she now thinks this may have contributed to her loss. She formerly wore a size 38 DD cup but now buys her bras in the young misses department, for girls under 16.

Never Crawl Into a Tight Place Upside Down

Man stuck upside-down in Utah cave dies

Entrance to Cave on Left

Nov 26 2009



By BROCK VERGAKIS - Associated Press Writer



SALT LAKE CITY— A man stuck upside-down in a cave for more than a day died early Thursday, despite the efforts of dozens of rescuers, authorities said.

John Jones, 26, of Stansbury Park died about 12:30 a.m., nearly 28 hours after he became stuck 700 feet into the cave known as Nutty Putty, Utah County Sheriff's Department spokesman Sgt. Spencer Cannon said.

Rescuers were next to Jones for much of the day but he was wedged in a small hole too tightly to pull him out or even reach through to assist him, Cannon told The Associated Press.

"They were right there with him, checking his vital signs," Cannon said. "They were able to get close enough to verify that he was deceased."

The 6-foot-tall, 190-pound spelunker got stuck with his head at an angle below his feet about 9 p.m. MST Tuesday. At times more than 50 rescuers were involved in trying to free him.

The crevice where Jones was trapped was about 150 feet below ground in an L-shaped area of the cave known as "Bob's Push," which is only about 18 inches wide and 10 inches high, Cannon said.

The rescue effort at the cave, about 80 miles south ofSalt Lakeue effort at the cave, about 80 miles south of Salt Lake City, was slow throughout the day Wednesday with crews chipping away with air-powered tools in the narrow tunnel.

At one point late in the afternoon, Jones was freed from the crevice, only to fall back several feet into the tight space when a cord that was supporting him failed, Cannon said

Rescuers were able to get him food and water during that temporary freedom.

In the hours after he became wedged again, Jones' physical condition deteriorated.

"He was experiencing difficulty maintaining consciousness and breathing. With whatever other factors there were, he did not survive," Cannon said.

Cannon said a medical examiner would determine the exact cause of death later. He said crews had suspended efforts to free his body for the night, but would resume at first light.

Jones, a medical student at the University of Virginia, was part of a group of 11 people exploring the cave passages.

"We were just looking forward to a good time," Mike Jones, the victim's 32-year-old brother, told The Salt Lake Tribune.

The group split up, with several children and some adults staying in a less dangerous area of the cave while others decided to explore further, 23-year-old Josh Jones, another brother, told The Salt Lake Tribune.

"It basically got to a point where we were trying to figure out if the cave went any further, and that's the route John decided to take," 25-year-old Joey Stocking of Logan told the Tribune.

Jones was going head-first into the crevice when he got stuck.

"He thought he could kind of keep going on his belly down further, but it got to point where he couldn't go any further and he got wedged in," Stocking said.

The group tried to free him.

"I was only able to see his two feet that was hanging there in the crevice," Josh Jones said. "I wasn't able to see more because he was engulfed in the crevice itself."

Nutty Putty cave is actually a hole on the top of hill about seven miles west of State Road 68. The naturally formed thermal cave is about 1,500 feet long. Its multiple, tunnels and passageways lead to room-like openings, a Web site for Utah cave-enthusiasts explains.

According to the official Nutty Putty cave Web site, the area was first discovered in 1960. The cave is privately owned by Utah's State Institutional Trust Land Administration. An access pass is required to explore the cave, with usage restricted to about six groups daily.

The county's last rescue there was in 2004.

Cannon said officials considered closing the tunnel or sealing it off after the last rescue but ultimately decided to erect a gate that requires a key for entry.

"We've had people stuck in this exact same spot. We're working and working to get him undone out of the spot and we don't really have any way of predicting what's gonna happen until _ boom, all of a sudden they're out," he said.

Jones' family, the owners of the cave, and public officials agreed not to attempt to recover Jones' body because the attempt would endanger those trying to reach him. The cave will be permanently sealed and will be the final resting place for John Jones' body.

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Major Dumb-Ass Calls 911 For Phone Sex

Busted For 911 Phone Sex

Florida man dials up cops from shower "to have some fun"


NOVEMBER 12--Meet Joshua Basso. The Florida man was arrested yesterday after allegedly placing a series of obscene 911 calls during which he asked a female operator about her breasts and whether she would have sex with him. When confronted by cops, Basso would not say whether he was masturbating while talking to the operator, as he claimed during the calls, according to a Tampa Police Department report. The 29-year-old rooming house resident admitted placing the calls, but "did not think he would get in trouble for calling 911." That miscalculation resulted in Basso being charged yesterday with a misdemeanor count of misusing the 911 system (he was booked into the Hillsborough County jail, where the above mug shot was taken).

Asked why he chose to dial 911 from among "all the numbers he could have called," Basso told police that his LG cell phone was out of minutes and he "called 911 because it was free." One of Basso's calls--which he placed while a shower was running in the background--seems to indicate Basso was pleasuring himself while an operator diligently tried to obtain his address.