Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Hottest in a Bikini Contest: Demi Moore vs. Dave Days



Sept. 7, 2010
Somewhere, USA

Recently, Demi Moore, the hot, toned 47 year-old American actor, published a photo of herself in a bikini bathing suit on one of the popular people sites. A young man, Dave Days, also posted a photo of himself wearing Demi Moore's bikini. Demi Moore told the young man she thought he wore the bikini better than she.

So, here at BizarreStuff, we decided to conduct a poll of our followers to determine how many think Demi Moore looks better in her bikini and how many think Dave Days looks better in Demi's bikini. We plan to send the results of our poll to Demi and Dave and mayhe Ashton Kuchner, Ms. Moore's younger lover.

Cast your vote by making a comment to this post which says either Demi or Dave. Please identify yourself as either female, male or something else. Do not vote for both candidates as this will invalidate your vote. This procedure will insure no phony votes are cast, unless it doesn't work.

Monday, September 6, 2010

Allegedly Partially Brain Dead Teenager Tries To Finish the Job - Fails



N.H. teen who zapped own nipples during shop class sues


The Associated Press

DOVER, N.H. —

A New Hampshire high school student shocked so severely in shop class that his heart stopped beating is suing his teacher, the school district and the city of Dover.

Kyle Dubois and his parents claim teacher Thomas Kelley did not warn Dubois and other students of the dangers of the electrical demonstration cords in their electrical trades class.

On March 11, Dubois attached an electrical clamp to one nipple while another student attached another clamp to the other. A third student plugged in the cord.

Dubois was critically injured. His hair was immediately permanently curled and his eyebrows singed.

The New Hampshire Union Leader says Dubois' suit contends he suffered permanent brain damage. The defendant School District responded that Dubois already had partial brain damage prior to the incident. It further contends this was caused by the teen's protracted use of drugs which it purports to demonstrate with the above photograph. Dubois's attorney has objected, saying the teenager in the photo is not his client but is Michael Phelps, the U.S. Olympic swimming sensation.

Kelley resigned from his teaching position about a month after the incident. He declined to comment on the lawsuit on the advice of his sister-in-law, a housewife in Ardmore, Okla., who declined an interview on the advice of her nephew.

And Now, For the Good News: Stoning On Hold, Lashing In, Possible Hanging For Adulteress


Iran woman who faces stoning death to be lashed 99 times, possibly hanged.

Sep 06 2010 Typical Stoning>>>>>>>>

TEHRAN, Iran — The son of an Iranian woman who faces death by stoning for adultery says authorities have imposed a new sentence of 99 lashes (this normally kills an average, 165 pound male in good physical condition) after a British newspaper ran a picture of an unveiled woman and mistakenly identified it as his mother.

Sajjad Qaderzadeh, 22, said Monday he did not know whether the sentence had been carried out.

The Times of London corrected the erroneous photo caption that identified the unveiled woman in the picture as 43-year-old Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani.

"Publishing the photo provided a judge an excuse to sentence my poor mother to 99 lashes on the charge of taking a picture unveiled," Qaderzadeh told The Associated Press.

Iran has delayed the stoning sentence after an international outcry, waiting for things to cool off a bit.

THIS IS A BREAKING NEWS UPDATE. Check back soon for further information. AP's earlier story is below.

PARIS (AP) _ French Foreign Minister Bernard Kouchner says he is willing to "do anything" to save an Iranian woman sentenced to death on an adultery conviction and has offered to travel to the Iranian capital to plead her case.

Bernard Kouchner calls Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani's sentence to death by stoning "the height of barbarism" and says her case has become a "personal cause" for him

Kouchner told reporters Monday after meeting with one of the woman's lawyer's in Paris that "I'm ready to do anything to save her. If I must go to Tehran to save her, I'll go to Tehran."

Iran lifted the stoning sentence for the 43-year-old mother of two after an international outcry. She could still be hanged.

A poll of Iranians revealed that most Iranian citizens think the Muslim clerics who sentenced her should be stoned, lashed and hung instead. An informal poll of about 100 Iranian clerics said they disagreed with the public and would sentence those responsible for the poll of the infidel Iranians who were against them to 50 lashes each, to teach them a lesson. Those responsible for the poll immediately booked flights for places such as Kabul, Coral Gables, Fla., Uzbekistan, Las Vegas and Ardmore, Okla.

Winging It In Buffalo


Va. woman devours 181 chicken wings in NY contest

Sep 05 2010

CRISTIAN SALAZAR - Associated Press Writer and an unidentified co-author




(AP Photo/National Buffalo Wing Festival, Brian Kahle)

In this photo provided by National Buffalo Wing Festival, Joey Chestnut, left, competes with Sonya Thomas, center, at 2010 Wing Fest in Buffalo, N.Y., Sunday, Sept. 5, 2010. Thomas, The Black Widow of eating contests gobbled up nearly 181 chicken wings in 12 minutes, devouring the national championship record.

NEW YORK — In an incredible display of gluttony, Sonya Thomas, The Black Widow of eating contests gobbled up nearly 181 chicken wings in 12 minutes, devouring the national championship record in Buffalo on Sunday.

The diminutive Ms. Thomas, who stands only 5 ft. tall and weighs 105 pounds, has a habit of knocking off much larger men in eating contests. Thomas bested world eating sensation, Joey Chestnut, by eating 4.86 pounds of wings in 12 minutes to win the contest at the ninth annual National Buffalo Wing Festival.

Buffalo, about 300 miles northwest of New York, is said to be the birthplace of the wings, typically fried and covered in tangy vinegar and hot sauce.

Chestnut, America's No. 1 professional eater, was favored to win Sunday's competition. He came in second after eating 169 chicken wings, or 4.55 pounds.

This was the first time Thomas, of Alexandria, Va., and Chestnut, of San Jose, Calif., faced off in a chicken wing eating contest. They went at it "neck and neck," said Drew Cerza, the founder of the festival, which was inspired by the 2001 Bill Murray comedy "Osmosis Jones," about a compulsive eater.

"They pushed each other really hard," Cerza said. "Joey is so strong. He's got great jaw strength. But Sonya's so fast with the hand."

Thomas, who calls herself the Black Widow because she often defeats bigger male competitors _ Chestnut is 6-foot-2 and weights 230 pounds _ in eating contests. She set the previous wings record in 2005, when she ate 174 in 12 minutes.

She also holds eating records for oysters, hard-boiled eggs, cheesecake and jalapeno peppers. She won her first competitive eating event in 2003.

During the public contest, in front of thousands of people, Thomas twirled the wings in her small fingers while quickly tearing off the meat with her teeth and lips.

Her cheeks were covered in a sheen of orange Buffalo sauce by the end.

But she said she was still hungry afterward, calling the wings "an appetizer." About an hour later, she made a guest appearance in the Ridiculously Hot Buffalo Wing Eating Contest and ate 20 more wings.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Two Public Idiots Square Off In Dispute Over Islamic Influence - Death Threat Made



Muslim cleric calls for beheading of Dutch politician Geert Wilders

DUTCH anti-Islam MP Geert Wilders, the country's most heavily guarded politician, has denounced an Australian Muslim cleric's reported call for his beheading for denigrating Islam.

"This is really terrible news and a very serious threat, unfortunately," the firebrand politician told AFP by email in response to the threat reported in the popular Dutch daily De Telegraaf.

Wilders, who campaigns for an end to Muslim immigration and a ban on the building of new mosques and the Koran in a bid to end the "Islamisation" of the Netherlands, has been under 24-hour protection since 2004.

According to De Telegraaf, Sydney-born Muslim cleric Sheik Feiz Mohamed called on extremists in an internet chatroom to "chop off his head" and accused Wilders of "denigrating" Islam.

An interview with Wilders recorded in June was aired by SBS TV in Australia on Sunday. He called Islamic culture retarded and violent.

Satanic skirts

Mohamed, as the head the Global Islamic Youth Centre in the Sydney southwest suburb of Liverpool in 2005, gained notoriety for a speech at the Bankstown Town Hall in March of that year in which he told the audience a rape victim has "no-one to blame but herself".

Women teased men and appealed to their "carnal nature" by the way they dressed in "nothing but satanic skirts", the imam told the crowd.

In 2007, he was named by national security sources as one of at least 10 hardliners who were preaching fundamentalist messages in Australia, propagating a Wahabi ideology espoused by al-Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden.

In the same year, Mohamed, who was believed to be living in the Middle East, came to the attention of Australia's attorneys-general when his lectures were included in a box set of DVDs which urged young Muslims to kill non-believers.

The Dutch intelligence service, AIVD, which is understood to have a copy of his latest speech, said Mohamed is considered on a par with US Muslim preacher Anwar al-Awlaki, who is seen as the brains behind a failed attack on a plane flying over Detroit.

Wilders told De Telegraaf, which published a recording of the speech on its website, that he is shocked by the death threat.

The newspaper claims to have a sound recording of the appeal by Muhammad, who it said had links with terrorists and was influential for Western Muslims.

Anti-terrorism

Wilders' Party for Freedom wants to restrict immigration from Islamic countries and considers Islam a violent ideology rather than a religion.

It is currently involved in protracted negotiations to support a minority centre-right government of free-market liberals and Christian Democrats.

Wilders said he would seek "clarification from the Dutch Minister of Interior/ Justice why the secret service and anti-terrorism unit NCTB have not informed me" of the reported threat, and "what the consequences will be for me".

"The information that has come to the fore will be included in the threat analysis for Mr Wilders," said NCTB spokeswoman Judith Sluiter, who added: "We had contact with Mr Wilders last night. We have permanent contact."

Dutch authorities would not confirm the threat or elaborate on possible steps to be taken.

Barred from entering Britain last year to stop him spreading "hatred", Wilders is known abroad for his 17-minute anti-Islam commentary, "Fitna", which was termed "offensively anti-Islamic" by United Nations Secretary General Ban Ki-moon.

His Party for Freedom came third in June 9 national elections, nearly tripling its number of parliamentary seats to 24.

Wilders is set to go on trial in the Netherlands in October on charges of inciting racial hatred against Muslims.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Another Good Reason to Ban Tasers


Police: Pa. woman zaps self, brother with stun gun

Sep 03 2010

Not the real Newara but a good approximation


NORTH EAST, Pa. — Police said an Erie-area woman somehow managed to zap both herself and her brother with a stun gun during a drunken dispute. Darlene Newara, 45, will have a hearing Oct. 18 on charges including driving under the influence, disorderly conduct for fighting, and public drunkenness in the Aug. 8 incident.

State police said they responded to a disturbance outside an Erie-area store about 6 p.m. to find that Newara had been arguing with her brother and stunned him with the device, then accidentally shocked herself with it.

Police said she was intoxicated and had several unopened bottles of liquor in the vehicle with her three sons, who were not hurt but were getting a pretty good example of how not to be a role model for your kids.

The Associated Press could not immediately locate a listed phone for Newara. It would not have mattered because Newara was too drunk to speak coherently.

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Information from: Erie Times-News, http://www.goerie.com

Really Dumb-Ass Montana Teen


Montana teen accidentally texts sheriff to buy pot

Sep 03 2010

HELENA, Mont. — General rule of thumb: when trying to buy marijuana, don't text the sheriff. Authorities said a Helena teen entered a wrong number and inadvertently sent a message to Lewis and Clark County Sheriff Leo Dutton, saying "Hey Dawg, do you have a $20 I can buy right now?"

A detective pretending to be the dealer organized a meeting at a time when the boy knew he and another teen would be at a particular store.

The detective spotted two teenage boys and one of the boy's fathers _ who was unaware of what was going on _ at the store. He called the phone number three times to make sure he had the right person. Dutton said when the detective showed the teens his badge, one of the boys fainted.

No citations were issued after the parents of the boys, who were 15 and 16, got involved. They promised to "whup those boys within an inch of their lives," according to a prerecorded message made by a local radio broadcaster who is friends with the boys' parents. After reviewing the message CPS moved to take the boys into state custody until they reach the age of 18.

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Some, not all, Information from: Independent Record, http://www.helenair.com