Face Garbage - The Latest in Trendy Fashion Statements

Man displays bold new fashion statement, on his face

Falkland Islands, Nov. 8, 2010

An unidentified man who is basically unidentifiable without the use of a large magnet and a small shrink, declared himself available for marriage or other similar relationship in a secret communique that has been withheld from the public. When asked by a reporter for the Dade County Pickaxe, a weekly publication about mountain climbing and violent assassinations, how he expected to get married or otherwise "hooked-up" with someone if he did not publish his interest, he retorted that "wasn't his problem."

He had a point so it was decided by the reporter to leave it at that. So she did, asking that her name not be used, and this is it. (Broad hint: It's Patti)

West Virginia Woman Knows What She Wants and Will Kill to Get It

Woman Utters Line Never Previously Recorded In A Police Report


Meet Melissa Lee Williams. The West Virginia woman, 41, is facing assault and weapons charges after allegedly waving a knife at two men who declined her demands to engage in sexual conduct with her at a West Virginia motor inn.

The October 22 incident is detailed in an amusing but gross Jackson County Sheriff’s Department report excerpted below.

According to investigators, Williams--who lives four doors down from her estranged husband at the 77 Motor Inn--showed up at his door and asked Danny Williams and another man to “eat my pussy.” At this point, Williams, pictured in the mug shot above, “commenced to undress herself,” reported Deputy Ross Mellinger.

While Danny Williams “declined said invitation,” the other man, Adam Watson, told cops that he “agreed to perform at her request.” However, as Watson approached Williams, “he became overwhelmed by the horrible vaginal odor emitting from Melissa Williams.” Watson, at this point, “declined to proceed any further.”

This is when Melissa Williams allegedly “produced a lock-back folding knife,” opened it, and pointed the weapon at her estranged husband. She then reportedly uttered a line never before memorialized in a police report: “Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I’m going to cut your fucking throat.” (emphasis supplied)

When Deputy Mellinger arrived on the scene he observed Ms. Williams--who, like the two men, appeared to be intoxicated--standing, nude from the waist down. After pocketing a knife that was on the coffee table in front of the woman, Mellinger arrested her for domestic assault and brandishing a deadly weapon.

Ms. Williams then offered for Deputy Mellinger to satisfy her wants. The Deputy also declined, explaining that he was on duty and could not take time out for recreation

Two-Fer In Montana Violence Spree - To Golf or To Rake Leaves?

Bozeman man being held in jail for assault with golf club

November 2, 2010

A Bozeman man was struck in the head by a golf club wielding assailant outside a Bozeman bar early Monday morning. The golfer is in the Gallatin County jail on $50,000 bond.

The golfer, 21, was charged with assault with a weapon, obstructing a police officer and resisting arrest.

Bozeman Police Sgt. Travis Munter saw three men fighting in a back alley behind the Bozeman Hotel at the corner of Rouse Avenue and Main Street just before 2 a.m.
When the officer intervened, two of the men began shouting that the third man had hit their friend in the head with a golf club. Multiple witnesses relayed a similar story, Munter wrote in his affidavit.

Munter said the golfer then shoved the officer and ran as he attempted to arrest him. The officer caught up with him a couple of blocks away.

The victim, who was taken to Bozeman Deaconess Hospital, said he didn't remember being struck but only waking up in the ambulance. The man was treated and released. No one knows who he was.


Another Bozeman man held for assault with a yard rake

November 2, 2010

In an unrelated occurrence, another Bozeman man, 24, is in jail after he attacked two neighbors with a rake on a second-floor apartment's deck in Bozeman last Saturday.

Phillip George Hollowell was charged with assault with a weapon after his neighbors and he got into an argument around 4:30 a.m. at their apartment building at 1322 S. Willson Ave., police said. No photo of the man was available but you can substitute the above photo whilst imagining the man has a rake instead of a golf club and get the general picture.

One of the victims said Hollowell became agitated because he had had some property stolen and began calling her "obscene names." She threw an empty beer can at the man, who was at ground level, but it did not hit him.

The suspect flew into a rage and grabbed a rake and ran up the stairs and began "jabbing it into her chest," the victim told police.

The male victim was struck in the face with the metal end of the rake as he tried to intervene. He sustained two cuts near his nose and eye, requiring 10 stitches.

Hollowell told police he "threw a rake up onto the deck towards both victims" and the rake "might have hit someone." His story was not very believable.

So Hollowell was jailed and held on $40,000 bond.

Low-Life Florida Grandmother and Boyfriend Try To Sell the Grandmother's Infant Grandson, For $30,000

Cops: Fla. woman tried to sell grandson for $30k

Nov 06 2010


(AP Photo/Volusia County Sheriff)

This undated image provided by the Volusia County Sheriff shows the booking photo for Patty Bigbee the Florida woman and her boyfriend who have been charged with trying to sell her infant grandson for $30,000.

DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. — A Florida woman and her boyfriend have been charged with trying to sell her infant grandson for $30,000.

Florida Department of Law Enforcement agents arrested 45-year-old Patty Bigbee and 42-year-old Lawrence Works on Friday in Daytona Beach after they met with an agent posing as a buyer. Both were charged with illegal sale or surrender of a child, and Bigbee was also charged with communication fraud.

FDLE agent Wayne Ivey said an investigation began last month after an informant told authorities the woman was trying to sell the baby. Authorities say the woman originally wanted $75,000 but was talked down to $30,000.

The child's mother is currently incarcerated on unrelated charges. She apparently was uninformed of the intended sale but told prison authorities she could use the money

The infant has been turned over to child welfare officials.

Authorities said they didn't know if Bigbee or Works had an attorney.

Several Courthouse lushes and hangers-on described the Grandmother as a "real looker." Arresting officers described the woman as more of a hag. You be the judge. "Looker or Hag?" Cast your vote as a comment to the post. The votes will be tallied and the winner awarded NOTHING. This is a shoestring blog.

Multi-Tasking Fool Filmed Endangering Himself and 1,000s of Other Motorists

Dangerous multitasking driver reads, phones and plays with a Kindle

From Newslite.tv - Odd News

Friday, November 05, 2010


A driver in the U.S. was filmed recently driving 60 mph, while reading a book,answering his cell phone and playing around with a Kindle reading device.

In the video the cameraman can be heard commenting that the man is reading a book -- which he has lodged between the steering wheel and dash -- while driving.

Then, as they film him, he pulls out a Kindle eBook reader… quickly followed by a mobile phone. Causing them to burst out with laughter.

Asian Master of Disguise Fools Officials in Hong Kong and Canada

Man uses unbelievable disguise to enter Canada, seeking asylum

Nov 05 2010

(AP Photo/Canada Border Services Agency)

A young Asian man disguised himself as an elderly white male and successfully boarded a flight to Vancouver, Canada, seeking refugee asylum.

An internal intelligence alert from the Canadian Border Service describes how the man boarded the flight in Hong Kong on Oct. 29 wearing a remarkable silicone mask that made him look like an elderly man.

A Canadian government official provided the document Friday on condition of anonymity as the official was not authorized to release it publicly.

The passenger began the flight as an "elderly Caucasian male who appeared to have young looking hands," the CBSA bulletin said. During the flight the man went to the washroom and came out as a young Asian male who appeared to be in his early 20s.

The man carried a bag that contained a "disguise kit which consisted of a silicone type head and neck mask of an elderly Caucasian male, a brown leather cap, glasses and a thin brown cardigan."

The man later admitted to officials he had boarded the flight with the mask on and had removed it several hours later. It is believed the man and another man performed a boarding pass swap. A government official said a U.S. passport was also involved.

Chris McCluskey, a spokesman for Public Safety Minister Vic Toews, said a man is in detention and said the matter is before Canada's Immigration and Refugee Board. A spokeswoman for the Immigration and Refugee Board declined comment.

Air Canada also confirmed a passenger on board flight AC018 had been met by border services officials in Vancouver.

"It should be noted that there are multiple identity checks before departure at the Hong Kong international airport, including Chinese government-run Hong Kong passport control, which Hong Kong originating passengers must undergo," according to an Air Canada spokeswoman. Apparently, all of these security checks failed miserably.

What it means for the rest of us is that the extremely high priced, intrusive, cumbersome, annoying and time wasting system of passenger identification is a colossal waste of time and resources. It should be jettisoned and forgotten.

A Girl's Got To Make a Living, Doesn't She?

Oldest Crack Dealer in America Headed to Slammer To Celebrate Her 89th Birthday



The oldest crack dealer in the nation was rewarded with 18 months in prison for her latest escapade. 87 now, Ola Mae Agee was sentenced this week to 18 months in prison. She will turn 89 before she is released.

Ola Mae Agee was convicted at trial this week of a felony charge of selling cocaine to an undercover cop in Florida. Agee was collared in May for selling crack from her Pensacola home. The transaction was videotaped by investigators with the Escambia County Sheriff's Office.

It took a jury all of 20 minutes to convict her. The octogenarian is shown here in a police photo snapped after she was taken into custody following the October 26 verdict.