Boulder, CO police target nude pumpkin run
A snow-covered pumpkin sits outside a home in Denver, Colorado, ready for action.
The runners will brave freezing temperatures and trigger happy cops.
Dozens of police officers are being deployed to the US city of Boulder, Colorado, at great expense, to try to prevent a zany yet harmless annual Halloween tradition.
Each year, dozens run down the city's snowy streets wearing only trainers and a hollowed-out pumpkin on their heads.
But, this year, the police are ready to try to provoke violence by arresting anyone who takes part in the Naked Pumpkin Run. Calling the naked run "an abomination to the Lord," a local Church of Christ minister for a church just emerging from Chap. 11 bankruptcy, stemming from fraud and the distribution of a controlled substance for use at prayer meetings, speaking at a "Clothes Not Optional" rally, said the naked run was another indicator of the moral decay of the nation, with innocent citizens being exposed to naked bodies by the 1,000's.
Police estimated that a crowd of more than 5,000 is expected to stand along the runners' traditional route and be "forced to see naked bodies passing by in the dark," said a fat, ugly prude from Kansas. "I've been attending every year for the past 7 years and it disgusts me every time," she continued, until being muzzled by an attendant from the local SPCA, which is co-sponsering the event with the Knights of Ponce de Leon.
Officials say they will charge pumpkin-clad runners under the city's law against indecent exposure. When asked to describe indecent exposure, the police chief said it was exposure that was not decent.
According to the Wall Street Journal, more than 40 officers will be present on the traditional route, with two elite teams of officers patrolling nearby, ready to attack dangerous nude runners with pumpkins on their heads with rubber bullets, tasers, AK-47's and at least one Patriot missile. (used to attack Iraq)
Last year, some 150 nude people turned out for the 10th event of its kind, which happens after nightfall. About two-thirds were male and a third female.
Similar runs have also taken place in other US cities including Seattle, Portland and Arcata, without incident because the cops stayed home and passed out treats to young children.
On its website, the group warns potential runners that "the violation of the Western societal more, enforced by law, of unclothed public exposure can indeed land you legal consequences. Furthermore, the decision to participate is yours and yours alone".
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