Wednesday, June 30, 2010

These Ducks Were Made For Eatin'

La. deputies say man planned to eat park duck

Jun 30 2010

CHALMETTE, La. — A St. Bernard Parish man was arrested Monday after sheriff's deputies said he stole a duck from a public park and planned to eat it. The Sheriff's Office said the man, 38, was booked with theft of an animal after someone saw him take a muscovie duck from Sidney Torres Park. A deputy found the man at his home with a duck inside a bucket in his van, authorities said.

Deputies said the man told them he intended to eat the animal.

The duck was returned to the park and set free.

Representatives of P.E.T.A. praised the actions of the police and pointed out the inequality of the rights of animals when confronted by humans. Some people have no regard for the the rights of animals and consider them fair game to be plundered.

Representatives of a local homeless shelter and soup kitchen pointed out that the elitists of organizations such as PETA can afford to go to an expensive restaurant and eat Roast Duck a la Orange and no one will criticize them or come and take their meal away from them. But they applaud the authorities when they prevent a hungry person from trying to put food on his own family's table. It's a double standard.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

You Kill Me Baby

Women Who Love Murderers

Jun 23 2010

By Barbie Latza Nadeau, The Daily Beast

Joran van der Sloot is the latest jailbird to get romantic attention from women.
For some women, there is nothing quite as sexy as a suspected killer.

Take Joran van der Sloot, the 22-year-old Dutch native awaiting trial for the murder of 21-year-old Stephany Flores. Apparently, Van der Sloot has been biding his time in a Lima jail cell, poring over love letters from a flood of women. "I get more letters every day," he bragged to the Dutch paper, De Telegraaf. "One of them even wanted me to get her pregnant."

Van der Sloot, who is also the prime suspect in the 2005 disappearance of American teen Natalee Holloway in Aruba, received moderate female attention when he was a suspect in that case. But his sex appeal has apparently skyrocketed since confessing to killing Flores earlier this month, even though he has since retracted his confession. The Dutch paper, which reportedly pays Van der Sloot to talk, says he is getting about 50 letters a day, including marriage proposals and promises to wait for him when he is released from prison.

(The Daily Beast, too, has received several letters from women, asking for Van der Sloot's address at the Miguel Castro Castro prison.)

Falling for felons is nothing new. In her 1991 book, Women Who Love Men Who Kill, author and journalist Sheila Isenberg interviewed three dozen women who fell in love with men who had been convicted of murder, or had confessed.

Isenberg believes that the attraction of Van Der Sloot and other murderers has to do with their media celebrity and that, culturally, bad guys are seen as macho. "We have always made media stars out of murderers," she told The Daily Beast. "Anyone who gets noted in the media can become an object of hero worship. Then as a murderer he has the added notoriety. It makes him sexier to some people."

Women and men who are desperate for attention also find captive criminals easier to love. Isenberg notes that real celebrities are less likely to respond to fan mail than someone in prison, making it easier to actually develop a relationship with the often-dangerous criminals. "Any guy sitting in jail or on death row will focus attention out of boredom," she says. "But that romantic focus is like a blazing light to some women."

A frisson of danger also seems part of the allure. But dating a suspected killer obviously holds real danger. Through her extensive research that also included talking to inmates, psychologists and social workers, she found that most of the women were victims of sexual or violent abuse, and many others were just interested in a relationship that could never be normal. Ultimately, the women sought out these relationships because the man couldn't hurt her if he was locked away. "Their capacity for denial and their need for a safe, idealized, romantic fantasy of love transcend judgment," she writes.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Marlboro Man, Step Aside

American Tobacco Companies' Newest Victory

June 26, 2010

Joe Camel, take a hike. Marlboro Man, who needs you? This poor kid already has a pretty serious nicotine addiction, but probably nowhere near as bad as his dad's parenting ignorance....

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

New York City Naked Cowboy Demands Naked Cowgirl Cease and Desist

NYC Naked Cowboy tells Naked Cowgirl: Stop invading my turf

Jun 22 2010

(AP Photo/Mary Altaffer, File)

NEW YORK— New York City's famous Naked Cowboy wants a bikini-clad woman who calls herself The Naked Cowgirl to stop ripping off his trademark.

The Times Square cowboy, whose real name is Robert Burck, is known for strumming his guitar wearing only briefs and a cowboy hat. He has sent a cease-and-desist letter to Sandy Kane, who wears a red, white and blue cowboy hat and matching bikini.

Burck says if Kane's going to make money by posing for photos, he wants her to sign a "Naked Cowboy Franchise Agreement." Most of his licensed franchisees are required to pay $5,000 a year or $500 a month and go through a screening process.

Kane, who is in her 50s, is a former stripper who's now a fixture of the city comedy scene. Her real name is Sandra Brodsky. She says she doesn't owe Burck anything.


Sunday, June 20, 2010

If PETA's Reading Bizarre Stuff, They Oughta be Pretty Pissed by Now....

Puppy thrown at German biker gang

16 June 2010 17:23 UK

A German student "mooned" a group of Hell's Angels and hurled a puppy at them before escaping on a stolen bulldozer, police have said.

The man drove up to a Hell's Angels clubhouse near Munich, wearing only a pair of shorts and carrying a puppy.

He dropped his shorts and threw the dog, escaping on a bulldozer from a nearby building site.

He was arrested later at home by police. The 26-year-old is said to have stopped taking depression medication (presumably leading up to this incident).

After making his getaway, if it can be called that, on the bulldozer, he had driven so slowly that a 5km tailback built up behind him on the motorway.

After driving about 1km, he had abandoned the bulldozer in the middle of the autobahn, near Allershausen. He continued his journey by hitchhiking.

"What motivated him to throw a puppy at the Hell's Angels is currently unclear," a police spokesman said, "but we're pretty sure it wasn't the puppy's idea."

The puppy is now being cared for in an animal shelter.

Cat Genocide in Wisconsin - Are Dogs Next?

100 Dead Cats Found in Nonfunctioning Freezer

June 19, 2010

BLACK RIVER FALLS, Wis. (AP) -- Social services has removed three children from a home in Jackson County where 100 dead cats were found in a nonfunctioning freezer. Sheriff Duane Waldera said filthy conditions and feces from another 17 live cats caused deputies to determine the house was unlivable.

Gabriella Bernabei said authorities are targeting her and her boyfriend because of their Wiccan religious beliefs. Bernabei said the cats were kept in the garage freezer because she planned to bury them. She said she was properly storing the carcasses until she could get to the burials.

Some neighbors and onlookers said Bernabei was stark raving mad and should be flash frozen herself. One neighbor volunteered the use of his own freezer for Bernabei.

Sheriff Waldera nixed the idea and said it might be unconstitutional to flash freeze Bernabei.

A spokesperson for the Wiccan Church of Wisconsin said there was no law prohibiting the storage of one's own dead cats in a freezer. She said the dead cats were the property of Bernabei and had been illegally seized.

A spokesman for the local humane society said the society would volunteer to try to revive the dead cats and then find homes for them. Some of the cats may have been dead for as long as 3 years. "As most of you know," said the spokesman, "cats have 9 lives. We won't know until the cats are examined by a veterinarian how many lives each cat has used up. Some could be permanently dead."

A spokesperson for the Wisconsin Department of Fish,Game and Domestic Cats said it is illegal to serve cats alcoholic beverages.

The live cats were taken to the Jackson County Animal Shelter. Animal control officer Barb Pfaff says some were too sick to save. "We gave them each a shot of bourbon and then euthenized them."
Information from: WEAU-TV, and Jbo Private Wire Services, Inc.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory of the Coming of the End - Glory, Glory Hallelujah!

The execution chamber at the Utah State Prison after Ronnie Lee Gardner was executed by firing squad Friday, June 18, 2010. Four bullet holes are visible in the wood panel behind the chair. There were five marksmen. One of the rifles was loaded with blanks. Gardner was convicted of aggravated murder, a capital felony, in 1985.(AP Photo/Trent Nelson - Pool)

Jun 18 2010

Firing squad execution sobering, but dramatic


DRAPER, Utah— The explosive reports sent a volley of .30-caliber bullets from the five marksmen into the chest of Ronnie Lee Gardner.

I was expecting to flinch but didn't as I watched his execution from the witness room.

It was so quick that for a split-second I wondered if it had actually happened.

There was no blood splattered across the white cinderblock wall at the Utah State Prison. No audible sounds from the condemned. I couldn't see his eyes. I never saw the guns and didn't hear the countdown to the trigger-pull.

A twice-convicted killer who had a troubled upbringing, the 49-year-old Gardner was executed by firing squad shortly after midnight on Friday. I was one of nine journalists selected to observe his death.

Utah is the only state in the union that still permits execution by firing squad, at the option of the condemned. Ronnie Gardner chose death by firing squad.

When the prison warden pulled back the beige curtain, Gardner was already strapped into a black, straight-backed metal chair. His head secured by a strap across his forehead. Harness-like straps constrained his chest. His handcuffed arms hung at his sides. A white cloth square _ maybe 3 inches across _ affixed to his chest over his heart bore a black target. A black hood covered his head.

Seconds before the impact of the bullets, Gardner's left thumb twitched against his forefinger. When his chest was pierced, he clenched his fist. His arm pulled up slowly as if he were lifting something and then released. The motion repeated.

Although the dark blue prison jumpsuit made it difficult to see, blood seemed to be pooling around Gardner's waist.

The silence was deafening.

A medical examiner checked Gardner's pulse on both sides of his neck, then lifted the black hood to check his pupils with a flashlight, offering a brief glimpse of his now ashen face.

It was 12:17 a.m. Only two minutes had passed since the shots were fired, but it felt like things had moved in slow motion.

About an hour later, prison officials let the media inspect the chamber. There was a strong smell of bleach, but no sign of blood.

The only evidence that a man had been shot and killed there were four holes from the bullets that impaled the black wood panels behind the chair. Right to left, the distance between them a few inches.

Prison officials say Gardner willingly made the 90-foot walk to the execution chamber Friday morning. That's hard to imagine, particularly from Gardner, who by his own accounts had spent much of the 30 years he was incarcerated "obsessed" with escape.

The state classifies executions as homicides. But this hadn't been like other homicides I had covered over my 15-plus years in journalism. In those instances, the media showed up after the death, not before.

This, however, was a meticulously orchestrated event with a sober, prepackaged ending.

Despite being surrounded by dozens of prison officials and witnesses, Gardner essentially died alone.

No one from his family watched him go. Nor were his attorneys present.

Similarly, Gardner chose not to utter any final thoughts or feelings.

Maybe it was his way of holding on to a small slice of privacy amid his very public death.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Church Festival Goers Get Drunk, Naked and Covered in Mud in Woods

Cops find naked drunk men covered in mud in woods

Jun 15 2010

LEWISTON, N.Y.— Police in western New York said two Canadian men attended a church festival and wound up in the woods drunk, naked and covered in mud. State police said troopers found a 22-year-old man from Hamilton, Ontario sitting along a road in the town of Lewiston, just outside Niagara Falls, around 5:45 a.m. Sunday.

Troopers said he was caked in mud. After questioning him, troopers found a 23-year-old man from Hamilton covered in mud and passed out in a ditch nearby.

Police said both men were highly intoxicated. Only one of the men's mug shots is shown here because the appearance of both men was very similar.

Several civilian witnesses questioned whether the police identification of mud on the revelers bodies was accurate, suggesting a more sinister substance, perhaps connected with mysterious Satanic rites. Soil in the vicinity of the church is black, lending more mystery to the discovery.

Troopers say the men had attended the St. John de LaSalle Carnival on Saturday and afterward decided to make it a "Woodstock event" by dancing naked in the woods. Both men were taken to a local hospital where they were treated and released.

A jail employee, speaking on condition of anonymity, said the mud had a very distinctive odor and jailers were hesitant to assist the men in getting cleaned up.

Neither man was charged.

Ex "Brave" Bullfighter Chickens Out

Cowardly bullfighter: Mexican matador flees from bull

Jun 15 2010

MEXICO CITY— The bull charged and matador Christian Hernandez took off _ across the ring, over the wall and into controversy.

The admittedly terrified torero was arrested after Sunday's botched bullfight at the Plaza Mexico, apparently for breach of contract, local media reported Monday. He was released after paying a fine.

"There are some things you must be aware of about yourself," the 22-year-old Mexican matador said in a television interview. "I didn't have the ability, I didn't have the balls, this is not my thing."

In a sight rarely seen in the bravado world of bullfighting, Hernandez made a spin with his red cape at the charging bull, then ran across the ring and leapt headlong over the wall to safety, dropping his cape in the process. The crowd hooted in derision.

Several months ago, another bull grievously gored Hernandez in the leg.

Officials did briefly convince Hernandez to return to the ring on Sunday, where he put his hands over his head and pointed upward before he made a second exit, shaking his head.

He later said he would retire from bullfighting.

Monday, June 14, 2010

Television's Reality Show Scam Prizes

Wanna know how much you actually get to stuff in your piggy bank when you win the $1,000,000 grand prize on one of the ubiquitous reality shows on every network, from "So You Want to Be a Millionaire," to "So You Think You Can Dance," and "Survivor?"

Try $375,000, less the average federal income tax rate for another $56,250, leaving the newly crowned "millionaire" a whopping $318,750. That's because the $1 million comes in the form of a 40 year annuity, which, if you live that long, will pay you $25,000 a year, less taxes, which means you won't be quitting your day job. If you want it all up front for your wife's kidney transplant, better start shopping around for the "No Frills Clinic" and an underemployed Doc in the Box who graduated last in her class at Med School, because your average kidney transplant bills out at around $60,000, not counting the cost of the hospital room or outpatient, after surgery care. With dialysis running $44,000 a year while waiting the average of 30 months for a compatible kidney, that's another $100 grand, which cuts you down to a net of $148,750, or about one-sixth of a millionaire. Live it up. Take a cruise.

Surprise, Senor Bull Killer! Bravo for Me!

Spanish Bullfighter takes one to the throat and mouth in Madrid outing

Madrid April, 2010

Julio Aparicio, a 41 year-old veteran Spanish matador, received a major surprise when he stepped in with his sword for the final kill. The bull turned the tables by stepping in more forcefully and planting one of his own weapons, a right horn to the throat and mouth of his adversary.

Aparicio first had to be disentangled from the bull and then rushed to a Madrid hospital where he was in stable condition with no life threatening injuries.

Despite its clear victory in the ring, the bull did not fair quite so well. It was killed by a substitute for Aparicio and taken away to be cut up into steaks and distributed to Madrid's poor.

And that's a lotta bull and no bull at the same time.

Double the Trouble

Tsutomu Yamaguchi: survived the bombings of Hiroshima on August 6, 1945 and Nagasaki on August 9, 1945. Photograph: Jemal Countess/WireImage

On 6 August 1945, Mr. Yamaguchi was in Hiroshima, on a business trip when the American B-29 bomber, the Enola Gay, dropped the first atomic bomb on the city. Yamaguchi lived, while 140,000 other people who were in the city that morning died, some in an agonising instant, others many months later.

Burned and barely able to comprehend what had happened - only that he had witnessed a bomb unlike any used before - Yamaguchi spent a fitful night in an air raid shelter before returning home the following day.

His home, 180 miles to the west, was Nagasaki. He arrived home on August 8, thankful that his life had been spared. As he was resting the following day, trying to regain his composure, a second American bomber dropped the second atomic bomb on Mr. Yamaguchi's home town, Nagasaki, killing 70,000 more. Miraculously, Yamaguchi survived for the second time in 3 days.

More than 60 years later, on March 23, 2009, the 93-year-old became the first and only known survivor of both attacks to win official recognition from Japanese authorities.

On January 10, 2010, Mr. Yamaguchi died, apparently of old age.

So it goes.

Here, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty....argh...ergh..gurgle.

New Chinese Hobby: Grooming Dogs to Look Like Other Animals

Saturday, June 12, 2010

That’s not a tiger in the picture, but a dog dyed to look like a tiger. It’s an example of what The Daily Mail reports is a growing hobby in China: dying and trimming dogs’ hair so that they look like different animals.

Recent figures show money spent on pets across the nation has seen nearly a 500 per cent increase between 1999 and 2008 – but, arguably, at the cost of their pets’ dignity.

Quite what the animals might think about it is another matter.

It has been rumored that a man in one of the outlying provinces is preparing his Bull Mastiff to look like a rhinoceros.

And at the link, keeshounds decked out as panda bears.

Link via Geekologie | Photo: China Foto Press/Barcroft Media

"Look, Ma, No Hands, No Brains"

Person in sunroof leads to drunken driving arrest

Jun 13 2010

YPSILANTI, Mich.— Police arrested a suspected drunken driver after spotting a passenger standing through the sunroof of her vehicle while it was heading down the street. Police told that an officer noticed the vehicle about 3:30 a.m. Saturday. Police said the 30-year-old woman was intoxicated, though they declined to release her blood-alcohol level.

The woman was later released pending charges of operating while intoxicated.


Saturday, June 12, 2010

Get Your Kicks on Route 66, Or an Average City Bus Route

Ore. man accused of hair-snipping on bus sentenced to 2 and a third years in prison

Jun 10 2010

PORTLAND, Ore.— A 23-year-old man accused of snipping the hair of unsuspecting bus passengers was sentenced Wednesday to 2 1/3 years in prison. Multnomah County investigators said Jared Weston Walter cut large clumps of hair from three women and stuck glue in the hair of one woman on Portland-area buses in the past year.

Walter had pleaded guilty to two counts of witness tampering. Prosecutors said that in one case he wrote his girlfriend, telling her what to say on the witness stand. They said he also asked a friend to buy scissors and plant them as evidence to lead investigators astray.

Oregon law doesn't specifically deal with stealing or gluing a stranger's hair. So prosecutors charged him with third-degree robbery among other crimes, and later with witness tampering.

Some seasoned court watchers thought the sentence was excessively long, exceeding that of the maven of decorative schlock, Martha Stewart, whose misdeeds were far more severe, including witness tampering that represented endangerment of the entire securities market.

Perhaps Martha will offer to decorate Jared's cell in Oregon, like she is depicted above decorating her own Massachusetts prison digs.

So it goes.


Can u txt & drv?

Apparently, She Thought She Could

June 4, 2010

Crank the radio up. Rant to Caytlynn on the bluetooth. Meanwhile, put on some mascara. Now punch it because you can't remember where you spent the night and you have to get... somewhere.

The jury's still out on this driving stunt / attention grabber. However, Danica Patrick probably doesn't need to worry about the competition.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

It's Daddy; I'm Home, Where are the Kids?

In this photo released by the civil police, Jose Agostinho Pereira is seen at a police station in Maranhao state, Brazil, Wednesday, June 9, 2010.

According to police, Pereira kept his daughter imprisoned for 12 years in a remote fishing village, raped her repeatedly and had seven children with her. Police allege that Pereira, 54, kept his daughter, now 28, under virtual house arrest in a two-room, thatched-roof hut near a tiny fishing village in northeastern Brazil.

A police spokesperson, speaking on condition of anonymity because he/she/it was not authorized to speak said the following:

"The place was a pig sty; there was filth, insects, excrement, dead rats, starving children stumbling about in the rubbish in search of a tiny morsel of nourishment, and always, Daddy, stupping his daughter, on the floor, in the trash, standing against a wall of the hut. The girl/woman must have been raped more than 2000 times while she was a captive. The offspring of this incestuous nightmare are retarded, deformed, unable to communicate, chronically ill and constantly on the brink of starvation. The father confessed to everything and said things had just gotten out of control when his wife left him and the children 12 years ago. He told the arresting officers that he couldn't think of anything else to do."

Update: Brazilian police released new information about this ongoing investigation. Mr. Pereira told police the sex with his daughter was consensual and that he had done nothing wrong. He said the daughter apparently had found him to be very attractive and that is what led to the consensual sex, It also was revealed that Pereira recently had began to have intercourse with one his daughter's own daughters, who would be Pereira's granddaughter. Pereira declined to answer when asked if the sex with his granddaughter was also consensual.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Woman says Citibank fired her for being 'too sexy'

Should "Hotness" be a Protected Class? Absolutely

June 3, 2010

Looking hot and sexy is no crime. But it seems true for a Queens woman who alleges her hotness cost her her job at financial giant Citibank.

Debrahlee Lorenzana, a former Citibank employee, alleges she was fired from a Manhattan bank for being too good-looking. Lorenzana, a 33-year-old single mom, alleges that she was terminated for being too gorgeous and that her ex bosses thought her curvy body shape was a distraction to her co-workers and supervisors- so much so that it cost her her $70,000 a year job at Citibank.

"In their exact words? Too distracting," ABC quoted Lorenzana as saying.

Lorenzana says the Citibank officials tolerated less conservative clothing on other Citibank female employees, but found her too steamy because she had a much more attractive body figure. She claims that numerous times her boss at a Citibank Branch in the Chrysler Building kept insisting she wear more conservative dress to work. “We don’t want you to wear turtlenecks; we don’t want you to wear pencil skirts; we don’t want you to wear fitted suits or even heels,” she told CBS. Apparently, they secretly hoped she’d wear nothing at all.

Lorenzana says the Citibank officials tolerated less conservative clothing on other Citibank female employees, but found her too steamy because she had a much more attractive body figure. “What they said to me is (other women’s) body types and my body type were different and because of my body type I drew too much attention,” Lorenzana said.

As for her fashion choices, the Latina lovely says she never flashed too much skin and dressed professionally, not provocatively, according to New York Daily News. "I can't help it that I have curves," she told the Daily News. "And I'm not going to go eat and gain 50 or 100 pounds because my job wants me to be the same size as everyone else. Everything I wore was professional, things everybody wears in corporate America," Lorenzana told The Post. "The way they looked at what I wore was very disappointing."

The lawsuit
The 5'6" and 125 pounds Lorenzana is now suing the bank, with lawyers filing papers claiming she was fired “as a result of the shape of her figure. In blatantly discriminatory fashion, plaintiff was advised that as a result of the shape of her figure, such clothes were purportedly 'too distracting' for her male colleagues and supervisors to bear."

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Crapola In The Cola

NJ teen admits defecating in classmate's soda
Jun 02 2010

CAMDEN, N.J.— His lawyer calls it a foolish prank, but a judge isn't laughing. A 17-year-old high school student from Haddon Township admitted in family court Thursday that he defecated in a classmate's soda during an auto-shop class.

Prosecutors dropped an aggravated assault charge in exchange for the boy's guilty plea to a charge of tampering with a food product.

Authorities said the victim sipped the soda, then spit it out as his classmates laughed on March 29.

A judge ordered the boy to serve probation, serve 200 hours of community service, write a letter to the victim to apologize _ and to write a 1,000-word report on why it's unhealthy to ingest fecal matter.

Dumbest Man Alive Discovered in Seattle

Police: Man shoots self in testicles

Jun 02 2010

SEATTLE— Police said a man accidentally shot himself in the testicles at a Lynnwood department store. Police spokeswoman Shannon Sessions said the man was carrying his handgun in his waistband and it accidentally went off about noon Sunday.

She said he was wounded in the testicles and also in his leg and foot. No one else was hurt.

The man was rushed to Harborview Medical Center in Seattle, but there was no immediate word on his condition.

A spokesman for the medical center, who was not authorized to speak because of patient confidentiality said the staff had concluded that the man was, in fact, the dumbest man alive,

Basic information from: The Seattle Times, Other stuff from the editor of this blog.