Tobacco Smoke Enema Anyone?

Tobacco Smoke Enema (1750s-1810s)

The tobacco enema was used to infuse tobacco smoke into a patient’s rectum for various medical purposes, primarily the resuscitation of drowning victims. A rectal tube inserted into the anus was connected to a fumigator and bellows that forced the smoke up the rectum. A photo of this "medical marvel" is shown above. The warmth of the smoke was thought to promote respiration, but doubts about the credibility of tobacco smoke enemas led to the popular phrase “blow smoke up one’s ass.”

Unhand That Cart Or You Are a Dead Man

Woman charged in dispute over shopping cart

By Drew Harwell, Times Staff Writer
Aug 16, 2009


ST. PETE BEACH — The grocery cart was hers, she said.

"I have a knife," Joy Smith, 58, told another shopper. "Give me back my cart."

Smith had been shopping Saturday at the St. Pete Beach Sweetbay Supermarket, an arrest report states. She had a Mighty Dog coupon and a few bucks to buy animal shelter supplies.

"I was just buying kitty-cat food," she said Sunday.

Then she met Peter Hagan. He began to harass her in the produce aisles, she said. She was scared.

Then he took her cart. She asked for it back, police wrote. Hagan held firm.

"Go get your own," he said.

Smith would not. She pulled out a pocket knife, held it at her hip. It was a bent and dinky little thing, she said. It couldn't cut butter.

"It wouldn't even open. I had a hand over the blade," she said. "I was going to get the handle and smack him on the nose, like you do an alligator."

Hagan, however, was terrified. He backed off and surrendered the cart, bursting into tears and calling Smith a bully. Smith reclaimed the cart and was last seen fleeing the store with the cart. Hagan asked the store manager to call police and filed an assault complaint against Smith, alleging Smith had threatened to kill him.

Police came at 8:25 p.m. to 7560 Bay Island Drive and arrested her with a charge of aggravated assault. She was taken to jail, had her mug shot taken. Then she was released.

Sweetbay banned her from the grocery store, she said. She needed a police escort to retrieve her van. But it wasn't all bad.

"At least I got my coupon back," she said. "I thought I lost my coupon."

Why Don't We Do It In The Road?

Cops: Lovebirds had sex in "full view" of pedestrians, motorists

AUGUST 28--Two young lovebirds are facing indecent conduct charges after a cop spotted them having sex "in full view" of motorists and pedestrians traveling on a Maine street. The exhibitionists, Faith Erman, 19, and Joseph Lattari, 20, explained to police that they had been at Erman's home last Saturday morning, but "decided to leave the apartment so that they could find a place to have sex without bothering other people at the apartment." The duo, pictured here, settled on a spot adjacent to College Avenue, according to the Orono Police Department report. That's where a cop discovered the naked duo at 5:45 AM (Erman was said to be on all fours "straddling" Lattari, who "was lying on his back on the ground"). "While they were putting their clothes on they repeatedly apologized for their actions," an Orono cop noted.

Man Gets Food and New Wheels at the Same Time

Police: Detroit man stole woman's car on 1st date

Aug 28 2009


Might Not Be the Real McCoy

Police in Michigan say a first date went from bad to worse when a Detroit man skipped out on the restaurant bill, then stole his date's car.

Police say 23-year-old Terrance Dejuan McCoy had dinner with a woman April 24 at Buffalo Wild Wings in the Detroit suburb of Ferndale. The woman says the two met a week earlier at a Detroit casino and she knew McCoy only as "Chris."

The woman told police that McCoy said he left his wallet in her car and asked for keys. He then sped away in the 2000 Chevrolet Impala.

The Daily Tribune of Royal Oak reports that police identified McCoy by a photo he'd sent to the woman's cell phone, and his phone number.

McCoy is charged with unlawfully taking the car, a five-year felony. He waived a preliminary exam and was bound over for trial Thursday.

He Never Liked That Cat After It Peed in His Shoes

Husband, wife, cat found fatally shot in NYC home

Aug 27 2009

Police say a New York City man called them to claim he had accidentally shot his wife and their cat in their home and then he apparently shot himself.

Fifty-one-year-old Karen Pizon was found shot in the torso Thursday on the living room floor of the single-family home in Staten Island. She was pronounced dead at a hospital.

Her husband, 51-year-old John Pizon, was found in a bedroom with a gunshot wound to his head. He was dead. A handgun was near his body.

The couple lived in a duplex in the middle-class neighborhood Bulls Head, named for a turn-of-the-century tavern that used to be at the area's main intersection. They had no children.

Police are investigating what led to the deaths.

New York's Finest Ignore Drug Dealers, Killers in the Steets to Arrest Nude Professional Model in Metropolitan Museum of Art

Nude model arrested in pic shoot at The Met in NYC

Aug 27 2009


It seems the only nudes allowed at New York City's Metropolitan Museum of Art are the ones in the collection.

Police say they arrested a 26-year-old woman who was posing naked for a photographer, and in full view of visitors, in the museum's arms and armor department on Wednesday.

Model Kathleen "K.C." Neill faces a charge of public lewdness.

Defense attorney Donald Schechter says the museum is full of nude art, and to call what the model and her photographer were doing obscenity "is ridiculous."

Photographer Zach Hyman directed the shoot. He's been getting some attention locally for photographing nude models on subways.

Hyman has said he's inspired by nude paintings at the Met and his photos are not pornographic.

___

New York City Puts On Free Sex Show for Park Patrons

New Manhattan park offers naked views of NYC hotel guests

Aug 25 2009


Some guests at a New York City hotel near an elevated park have been offering unobstructed views of themselves.

Guests at the Standard Hotel in Manhattan keep failing to close the curtains as they frolic naked in front of their rooms' floor-to-ceiling windows, easily viewed from the High Line park below. The park recently opened atop an abandoned elevated rail line.

City Council Speaker C___ Q___, a wrinkled old biddy who hasn't gotten laid in 20 years has called the hotel's window action "unacceptable." Yeah, unacceptable because she can't get in on the action.

According to the hotel manager there have been no complaints from hotel guests and they have had repeat visits to the hotel, some couples as many as 3-4 times. "We have had several recent calls about group rates," he said.

Many of the hotel guests appear to enjoy the opportunity to get naked in front of a crowd of anonymous people. One young female guest said it was a real turn on for her to have sex with her boyfriend in front of a crowd. "Here, I'm safe in my hotel room, I'm not breaking any laws and I can act out my wildest sex fantacies, give my boyfriend the ride of his life, and give the voyeurs a good time, too. What an great way to give something back to the community," she said.

One of the hotel guests displaying the least amount of bare flesh agreed to pose for the above photo, on condition of not being identified. She said she was just getting warmed up and planned to strip down to no clothing at all later in the evening. "You can watch me from the park," she chuckled.

Aaron Lipman works in the neighborhood and says the shows are "healthy and fun." He says they're like TV's "Wild Kingdom" and he sometimes brings his 7 year-old granddaughter to 'see the show.'" "My granddaughter tells me there is nothing new for her to see because she sees her mommy and daddy doing the same things all the time."

The hotel issued a statement Monday saying its managers will "try" to "remind guests of the transparency" of the windows. With a 100% occupancy rate I'm sure they will.

The hotel won an award from the Municipal Arts Society of New York for best new building erected last year. Since then it may have had more erections than any other building in the city.

Hatfields and McCoys Just Can't Let It Go

Feuding families cause riot of about 150 in Ala.

Aug 24 2009


Two Alabama families that have been fighting for years turned their feud into a full-scale riot Monday outside a small-town city hall, with up to 150 screaming people hurling tire irons and wielding baseball bats. Eight people were arrested, and at least four were hurt, Trooper John Reese said. Two were taken to hospitals. The town's police chief was hit in the head with a crowbar but was OK.

The 100-year-old feud apparently prompted a fight earlier in the day at a high school, after a window was shot out of a home Sunday night. Then, "all hell broke loose" later in the day, said Sgt. Carlton Hogue of the Perry County Sheriff's Department.

"It was a full-scale riot is what it was," said Tony Long, mayor of the town of 3,300 about 85 miles west of Montgomery.

Hogue said the rioters were "throwing jack irons, throwing tire irons, anything they could get their hands on." Some people carried baseball bats and brooms.

Reese said two people were arrested at the high school during the initial disturbance. Relatives of the people who were arrested followed officers to police headquarters at city hall, and then the melee erupted.

Six more people were arrested at city hall, Reese said, and police called in reinforcements from surrounding cities. Some officers wore riot gear, and many planned to stay overnight to help maintain order.

The mayor said he wasn't sure what sparked the fracas.

"Everybody's trying to point the finger at everybody," he said.

Judson College, a church-affiliated women's school with about 300 students in downtown Marion, issued an alert asking students to stay out of the downtown area for 24 hours as a precaution.

Oops, sorry....our bad.....you really are not going to die in in few years.

1,200 veterans wrongly told they had fatal disease

Aug 24 2009
P.J. DICKERSCHEID - Associated Press Writer

Former Air Force Reservist Gale Reid received a letter from the Veterans Affairs Department that told her she had Lou Gehrig's disease, and she immediately put herself through a battery of painful, expensive tests. Five days later, the VA said its "diagnosis" was a mistake.

The Montgomery, Ala., resident was among at least 1,200 veterans who received a letter about disability benefits for ALS, also known as Lou Gehrig's disease, even though they hadn't been diagnosed with the illness, according to the National Gulf War Resource Center. Veterans were initially suspicious of the letters, but still went through the agony not knowing exactly whether they had the fatal disease, which typically kills people within five years.

At least 2,500 letters informing veterans of disability benefits for ALS were sent out, and of those, some 1,200 were a mistake, according to the National Gulf War Resource Center. The wrongly sent letters were supposed to inform veterans of an undiagnosed neurological disorder, according to the Gulf War veterans group, which provides information, support and referrals about illnesses to veterans.

No one knows for sure exactly how many letters were mailed to veterans treated at VA hospitals and how many were a mistake. VA spokeswoman Katie Roberts didn't return telephone messages or an e-mail Monday.

Former Army Sgt. Samuel Hargrove cried Sunday after opening his letter.

"I can't even describe the intensity of my feelings," said the father of two from Henderson, N.C. "With so many health issues that I already have, I didn't know how to approach my family with the news."

So, at first, he didn't. Hargrove later discovered the mistake after talking with fellow veterans in the resource center and online, and he became angry.

Reid was just as upset.

"I've been through a week of hell, emotionally, physically and financially," she said.

Denise Nichols, vice president of the National Gulf War Resource Center, said her group has received calls and e-mails from panicked veterans in Alabama, Florida, Kansas, North Carolina, West Virginia and Wyoming.

"Our fear was this could push somebody over the edge," said Nichols, who was worried the news could lead already fragile veterans to commit suicide. "We don't want that to happen."

Jim Bunker, president of the veterans group, said he talked to someone at the VA and was told the mistake was caused by a coding error. The VA uses more than 8,000 codes for various diseases and illnesses and veterans with undiagnosed neurological disorders, which can range from mild to severe, were accidentally assigned the code for ALS, he said.

ALS is a rapidly progressive disease that attacks the nerve cells responsible for controlling voluntary muscles.

Nichols said she suspected something was amiss because some of the veterans she knew who received the letters did not exhibit any ALS symptoms. Hargrove said he became suspicious because the letter didn't come from his doctor, and Reid said she sought a second opinion even though she believed the letter wasn't the right way to inform patients of a diagnosis.

The veterans groups notified the VA of the problems late last week, and the agency was in the process of calling every person who mistakenly received a letter, Bunker said.

The VA has taken some heavy criticism already this year. In June, Congress questioned the agency over botched colonoscopies at medical centers in Florida, Georgia and Tennessee that may have exposed 10,000 veterans to HIV and other infections. Last month, the VA Medical Center in Philadelphia disclosed that the number of cancer patients receiving incorrect radiation doses had risen to 98 veterans over a six-year period.

The Gulf War veterans group is urging the VA to reimburse any veteran who scheduled additional tests with civilian doctors. Reid said her tests cost about $3,000, though it may take weeks before she finds out how much her private insurance will cover.

"We are trying to work with the VA because we realize it was an error and they were trying to do something right for the people who were diagnosed with ALS," Nichols said. "Basically this was a good effort that ended badly."

Kill Bill

Aug. 23, 09
Acadia National Park

A group of tourists, gathered on a large rock overlook to watch the fury of Hurricane Bill as it swept up the Eastern Coast of the U.S. were themselves swept out to sea by a giant rogue wave. It was not known how many perished in the swirling, roiling waters of the hurricane. Two adults and a child were pulled from the ocean but only one of them survived, a woman.

New Afghan Law Passed: Food for Sex

Aug. 23, 09

A woman protester, symbolically represents male anatomy, set to explode

An activist wearing a belt with sausages and an alarm clock takes part in rally protesting Afghanistan’s “Family Law,” in Kiev, August 21, 2009. Afghan authorities passed a law allowing men to deny their wives food if they refuse to obey their husbands’ sexual demands. REUTERS/Konstantin Chernichkin

In a candid interview with a reporter, who spoke on condition of bulemia, the legislator responsible for proposing the new law admitted to having sexual problems with his own wife. He said the new law was designed to bring about greater harmony in sexual relations between married couples.

In a poll only one-tenth of one per cent of women agreed with the new law, as opposed to 99.4 per cent of men. But most men (58.6%) stopped short of enforcement that results in death by starvation.

Take This Job and Shove It

Wal-Mart worker accused of beating boss with bat

Aug 22 2009



Police in New Haven accused a Wal-Mart worker of beating an assistant manager in a store aisle with an aluminum baseball bat after getting reprimanded for the second time in a few days. Officer Joseph Avery said Tuesday that police are still looking for the 26-year-old suspect. They plan to charge him with first-degree assault and breach of peace.

Avery said the worker grabbed the bat off a shelf and hit 29-year-old assistant manager George Freibott nearly a dozen times at about midnight Monday, after Freibott wrote the worker up for poor job performance.

Avery said Freibott suffered a possible broken arm and many bruises.

Police said the store was closed to shoppers at the time.

Fake TV Salesman Nabbed for Trying to Sell Fake TV.

Police: Man tried to sell fake TV


Police artist's sketch


Aug. 11, 2009
SAN LEANDRO, Calif., Aug. 12 (UPI) -- A California man tried to trick someone into buying an oven door the man said was a flat-screen TV, police said.

San Leandro police said the man was pulled over last week and officers noticed a box for a brand-new, 37-inch Sony TV in his car. But all they found inside the box was a glass oven door disguised as a television, the Oakland (Calif.) Tribune reported.

The man claimed he was attempting to sell the item as a fake TV, for people who can't afford the real thing but want to impress their friends by having a large, flat screen TV. He said he got the idea when he found the large, empty TV box and the door fell off his oven at the same time.

Police said they pulled the man over because of an anonymous call from someone who said a man tried to sell him a TV for $100 out of his car in a Wal-Mart parking lot and gave police a description of the man's beige 1980 Oldsmobile Cutlass. The caller also described the man as appearing confused and unable to describe the TV or explain where he acquired it.

Anthony Myles, 52, was arrested on a charge of driving on a suspended license. Police said no other charges were filed.

South Carolina Woman Gets Huge Dental Surprise

Woman awarded $2M after dentist mistakenly pulls 13 teeth

Aug 21 2009


A South Carolina woman has won a $2 million jury verdict against a dental clinic that mistakenly pulled 13 teeth. The State reported that 28-year-old Elizabeth Smith wanted three teeth pulled when she went to the Sexton Dental Clinic in Florence in 2006. Her lawsuit said a dentist at the clinic instead pulled all 16 of her upper teeth.

Smith's attorney told the jury Smith, pictured above, had planned to become a model but had suffered such severe emotional distress that she had lost most of her hair, suffered insomnia and had aged prematurely. One female juror became so upset on seeing phtographs of Smith before the extractions and comparing them with the woman testifying from the witness chair that she fainted and had to be carried from the courtroom on a stretcher. She returned after a recess and joined the other jurors in their deliberations.

State court records in Florence indicate the jury returned the award late last week.

One of Smith's lawyers, Robert Ransom, said the woman plans to have restorative surgery as soon as possible. That's estimated to cost about $80,000. She also will undergo plastic surgery and hair transplants in an effort make her appear younger again.

Clinic attorney Saunders Bridges said he is considering an appeal, claiming the jurors became inflamed with passion and that the excessive mount of the award shocked the conscience of the court and the community.

Man Falls From Bridge, Bounces Off Windscreen of Fire Truck and Faceplants the Ground

Summer, 2009

Police say man standing on rail of bridge lost his grip and fell 40 feet

A shirtless man, who appeared to be drunk, captured the attention of a small crowd, including police when he stood on the railing of a railroad bridge and threatened to jump. As police tried to talk the man into remaining calm a firetruck had been summoned with a ladder long enough to reach the man. Just as it was arriving below the bridge the man slipped and fell, striking the windscreen of the rescue vehicle.

Watch the live action, captured on video below:




Drunk Falls Off Bridge Slams Firetruck Faceplants Ground - Watch more Funny Videos

British Shoeshine Woman Gives It Her All

August 21, 2009

British Vacation Attractions

A woman shining shoes in a public square in England attracted a great deal of interest and had many customers because of her unique shining style.

When asked by a passing Bobby if she always dressed like that when working, the woman told him it was her lucky blouse. She said she always got much larger tips when she wore it so she had been wearing it almost every day and was concerned it might wear out from daily washing.

She said she had many loyal, repeat customers, including two or three clients who got their shoes shined in the morning on their way to work and again in the evening, before going home. She said one gentleman had paid her 15 quid to shine his shoes three times in a row.


Giant Boobs Prank - Watch more Pranks
August 21, 2009

Which Came First, the Lawyers or the Coke?

Lawyer-Heavy States Have Higher Cocaine Use

Aug 17, 2009
By Debra Cassens Weiss

Cocaine is more likely to be used in states with heavy concentrations of lawyers, a statistical analysis concludes.

Marijuana use, on the other hand, is associated with states with higher concentrations of artists, scientists, architects and educators, according to the Atlantic’s analysis of data from the National Survey of Drug Use and Health. The findings showed a statistical correlation between cocaine use and the number of people in a state employed as lawyers and, to a lesser extent, in business and finance occupations, computer jobs, and management fields.

Psychologist Jason Rentfrow, who worked on the analysis, told the Atlantic: “I think it's interesting that cocaine is high for finance, law and quant professions. Although we can't infer whether it's people in those jobs actually doing drugs, those professions are generally regarded as intense and lavish. So it's interesting that an expensive stimulant like cocaine is used more often in places where comparatively large numbers of people work in intense and high-paying jobs. …

“It's also interesting that marijuana is popular in places with artists, designers, and architects because those are jobs that encourage divergent thinking, and marijuana is a psychoactive drug that's associated with creativity.”

Barbie Doll Ex Model Mutilated and Stuffed in Suitcase

Police: Slain model's fingers, teeth were removed

Aug 20 2009

By GILLIAN FLACCUS


(AP Photo/Los Angeles Police Department)

This image provided by the Los Angeles Police Department shows Jasmine Fiore, who has been identified as the woman whose body was found stuffed inside a suitcase and placed in a dumpster and discovered Aug. 15, 2009. Police said Ryan Alexander Jenkins, 32, a reality TV personality, is a ''person of interest'' in her death.

A reality TV contestant was charged with murder Thursday in the death of his ex-wife as the manhunt for the suspect spread to Canada and police provided gruesome new details about the killing.

Police said Ryan Alexander Jenkins removed the teeth and fingers of Jasmine Fiore, presumably to impede authorities in their efforts to identify the naked body after it was found stuffed in a suitcase in a California trash bin over the weekend. Fiore's body ultimately was identified through her breast implants.

The former swimsuit model and Jenkins were briefly married after a quickie Las Vegas wedding this year, and had been fighting in recent months. Prosecutors said the two checked into a San Diego hotel Aug. 13, and Jenkins checked out the next morning. Fiore was not seen alive again.

He reported her missing Saturday night and then vanished after the body was found. Authorities suspect he drove 1,000 miles to Washington state and then hopped in a boat to a peninsula on the border, where he walked into Canadian territory. Canadian police said ground, air and canine units are involved in the search.

"At this time, although we believe he crossed the border, we're not one hundred percent sure of that," U.S. Marshal Chief Inspector Thomas Hession said. "There will be no stone unturned and we'll look under every rock for him." Buena Park police Lt. Steve Holliday said he's possibly armed with a handgun.

A car and empty boat trailer belonging to the 32-year-old Calgary, Alberta native were found at a marina in the remote northwest Washington town of Blaine.

Whatcom County Sheriff's deputies received a report Wednesday that a man matching Jenkins' description arrived by boat at Point Roberts, Wash., about 10 miles from Blaine at the tip of a peninsula. The point is reachable by land only from Canada, and Jenkins is believed to have walked across the border from there.

Canadian Public Safety Minister Peter Van Loan said police agencies across Canada are on the lookout for Jenkins.

Jenkins was a contestant on the VH1 reality TV show "Megan Wants a Millionaire."

After taping for the VH1 series finished in early March, Jenkins met 28-year-old Fiore in Las Vegas casino and the two got married on March 18, said Fiore's mother, Lisa Lepore.

But in May, the two were fighting because he was jealous of her ex-boyfriends, Lepore said. "She had the marriage annulled."

Fiore's ex-boyfriend, Robert Hasman, urged Jenkins' friends and family to help police find him.

"Ryan Jenkins is an animal, what he has done to Jasmine is unspeakable and it's just not right and I'd appreciate your help," Hasman said at a news conference.

The federal government was issuing a federal warrant which Canadian authorities can use to detain him on the murder charges, Buena Park Police Capt. Ken Coovert said.

If Jenkins is apprehended north of the border, authorities there could extradict him but only with assurances that he would not face the death penalty. Farrah Emami, a spokeswoman with the Orange County district attorney's office, said the death penalty issue hasn't been addressed yet.

Prosecutors recommended a bail of $10 million.

Associated Press writers Robert Gillies in Toronto, Jeremy Hainsworth in Vancouver, Robert Jablon and Raquel Maria Dillon in Los Angeles, Ken Ritter in Las Vegas, Amy Taxin in Buena Park and Doug Esser in Seattle contributed to this report.

Man Assaulted and Busted By Cop For Possession of Breath Mints?

Man Serves Three Months in Jail for Possession of Certs

**Mugshot May not be the real May.

August 19, 2009

So this dude is driving down the street, on the way to pick up his girlfriend when the cops pull him over. He's thinking, "Yeah, I've got expired tags, I've been meaning to take care of that."

So he's all prepared for a ticket, hopefully only a warning. He rolls down the window to greet the officer with a cheerful smile and minty fresh breath from the breath mint he popped before meeting his girl. However, he gets a surprise when the cop demands to know what he has in his mouth. He pops out his tongue to display his Certs which the cop promptly grabs, bags and tags. The next thing he knows he's arrested, taken to jail and charged for possession of crack cocaine and for tampering with evidence by trying to eat it.

Next, Donald May, the alleged perp, finds himself languishing in a Florida jail for 3 months while the cops try to tell the difference between a Certs breath mint and a crack rock:

May had been stopped for the expired tag on his car. When the officer walked up to him, he noticed something white in May’s mouth. May said it was breath mints, but the officer thought it was crack cocaine.

The arresting officer claimed he field-tested the evidence and it tested positive for drugs. The officer said he saw May buying drugs while he was stopped at an intersection. He also stated in his report May waived his Miranda rights and voluntarily admitted to buying drugs.

May said that never happened. “My client never admitted he purchased crack cocaine. Why would he say that?” attorney Adam Sudbury said.

May was thrown in jail and was unable to bond out for three months. He didn’t get out until he received a letter from the Florida Department of Law Enforcement and the State Attorney’s Office that test results showed no drugs were found.

While he was in jail, the cops towed his car and auctioned it off. He also lost his job, was evicted from his apartment, and dumped by his girlfriend.

Now May is suing the city for false arrest and false imprisonment. He might also sue the cop for assault. He wants to be compensated for the loss of his car and job. No mention was made of the lost girlfriend in his claim for damages.

Dope Tries to Hide Bra Full of Dope - Arrested

Police: Mass. woman hid 19 bags of crack in bra

Aug 19 2009


A woman was arrested after admitting to police that she hid 19 bags of crack cocaine in her bra. Sandra Sanborn was charged Sunday with possession of crack cocaine with intent to distribute following a tip to Quincy's police drug unit.

Capt. John Dougan said when detectives approached the 33-year-old woman at a Quincy building, she was holding a bag containing crack cocaine in her hand. Dougan said Sanborn then produced 19 more bags tucked away in her bra.

Police seized the drugs, two cell phones and an SUV. Neither of the phones or the SUV were taken from the woman's bra.

Dougan said Sanborn is scheduled to be arraigned Monday in Quincy District Court.

It was not immediately clear if Sanborn had hired an attorney yet.

Five-year-old Boy Cited for Obstructing Traffic in Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates

August 18, 09

A five-year-old boy on a mini-motorbike was ticketed by a traffic cop for obstructing traffic on a downtown street undergoing repairs in Abu Dhabi. The boy, who does not know how to write, was unable to sign acknowledging receipt of the citation. According to a local lawyer, failure to sign could subject the boy to arrest, imprisonment and possibly torture.

Lawyer Pleads No Contest in Play for Pay Scheme With Female Divorce Clients

Assortment of Clients

Aug 17, 2009
By Martha Neil

A California divorce lawyer has pleaded no contest to four felony counts of sexual battery and one felony count of attempted sexual contact.

The plea deal is expected to result in a prison sentence of no more than 18 months followed by five years of probation for attorney Gary Michael Appelblatt, 58. Had he been convicted of the 13 counts concerning five different alleged victims that he initially faced, a far longer sentence would have been likely, reports the Sacto 9-1-1 blog of the Sacramento Bee.

Appelblatt was accused in court testimony of improperly touching matrimonial clients under the guise of performing medical procedures, the newspaper recounts. He reportedly claimed to have a pharmacy degree.

The case was brought under a state criminal statute that addresses sexual battery conducted under the guise of a "professional purpose." However, Appelblatt's lawyer argued that the alleged victims knew they weren't seeing a medical professional and some still continued to allow him to represent them to the conclusion of their cases, according to a 2008 Sacramento Bee article about the case.

In one instance, the lawyer allegedly offered a client a $5,000 discount on her legal fees to have sex with him, then offered to cut the bill even more if she could persuade a friend to join them, according to a motion to dismiss filed by his lawyer, Tom Johnson. The motion says the client hung up the telephone on Appelblatt, who then stopped billing her altogether.

Home Sweet Lego Home

Man gets loads of assistance building home.


To Live In House Made Of Lego Bricks

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

When Top Gear presenter James May asked for help building a house out of Lego bricks, a total of 2,700 volunteers showed up at the vineyard where the two-story, plastic house is under construction. He had to limit the crowd to 1200. May said the idea for the house came up in the same way as do most brilliant ideas; while drinking beer.

Murder for Hire Wife Get's Busted Instead

Dalia Dippolito, who's not exactly ravishing (see photo), got married 6 months ago. She decided a few months into the newly wed game that it wasn't for her. But rather than hire a lawyer, file for divorce, and get rid of that godawful name, Dippolito, Dalia thought she had a better plan. Have he husband killed. So she asked around if anyone knew a killer she could hire.

Eventually, someone smarter than she put her in touch with an undercover police officer, posing as a hit man. Dalia paid the cop $1200 to buy a gun, then arranged a time for the hit so she could establish an alibi and promised him $3000 when the job was done. After her husband had supposedly been murdered, the police came to notify her of the tragedy. She fell into the arms of one of the officers and began sobbing noisily.

She accompanied the police to the station "for some paperwork," where she was introduced to the undercover cop/alleged hit man. She was also informed that her live and well husband was in the next room. She began yelling that she wanted the undercover fake hit man charged with fraud and theft for taking her money under false pretenses. She was booked, fingerprinted, given a new outfit and shower slides, and led off to a cell.

Woman Dressed Only in White Fishnet Stockings Wakes Neighbors Who Call Cops

Wearing white fishnet stockings and nothing else,

Sherry "Cougar-in-training" McNeal, 47, repeatedly slammed herself into a Ridley Park, Philadelphia home. The neighbors heard the ruckus and thought she was trying to break into the house so they called the police. Shades of Professor Henry Gates. Well technically she was trying to break in, because the door was locked.

The police arrived to arrest the naked alleged burglar, only to discover she was a guest at the home. She didn't know how she got outside, and she didn't know why she was naked. Her equally inebriated host had no clue either. The cops had a pretty good idea, and cited both for disorderly conduct and told them to stay inside. No word yet if the President will invite the naked woman and the police to the White House for a beer.

(Source: philly.com)

Do You Know This Woman, A Key "Player" in Basketball Scandal?

Famous coach in hot water over hot woman

Rick Patino, famed University of Louisville basketball coach, has acknowledged an extra-marital affair with a woman who became Patino's Assistant's wife. The woman, Karen Sypher, appears in the photo to the left.

A contest has been initiated to see who can guess what qualities of Ms. Sypher first attracted the coach. Only two qualities per entrant, please. The winner will receive two court side tickets to a women's junior high school basketball game in the city of their choice.

In case of a tie, the winner will be the entrant with the earliest time and date stamped comment to this blog. All decisions of the editor are final.

Man Fakes Religious Beliefs to Get More Expensive Prison Meals

Court rules Mich. prison can stop man's kosher meals

Aug 14 2009

A Michigan prison inmate who says his kosher meals were illegally suspended isn't getting any relief at a federal appeals court.

In 2005, convicted killer Phillip Berryman stopped receiving costly kosher meals at St. Louis Correctional Facility after he was caught buying non-kosher munchies at the prison store.

The 66-year-old Berryman said the snacks were for another inmate, but that defense was rejected. He sued, claiming his suspension from kosher meals was a burden on his religious liberties.

In an alternative defense Berrymanclaimed he had talked to God about the insufficiency of the prison meals and asked God's permission to supplement his diet with non kosher items from the prison store and God had approved.

The appeals court this week said Michigan has a legitimate interest in maintaining discipline and ensuring that only inmates with "sincere beliefs" participate in the kosher program.

Berryman, who is serving a life sentence, now is at a Michigan prison in Jackson.

No Prescription Eh, Doc? What if I Just Take This Finger Instead?

Patient charged for biting off doctor's fingertip

Aug 13 2009

Might not be the actual perp>>


Authorities said a patient at a Cape Coral doctor's office bit part of the doctor's finger off after being denied a prescription. Police reported that a 45-year-old man went to see Dr. Paul Arnold Wednesday morning, and the man became upset about not receiving prescription medication.

Police said Arnold turned his back and the man attacked him. The patient reportedly bit Arnold several times, taking off the doctor's fingertip with one bite.

The fingertip was recovered at the scene and Arnold was taken to a nearby hospital.

Police have put out a warrant for the patient's arrest on a charge of aggravated battery.

In The You've Got to Be Kidding Category.

'Money cleanser vanishes with $140,000

Aug 12 2009

Police said a mysterious woman known as Senora Monica offered to spiritually "cleanse" money for at least seven Hispanic families, but it was the families who got "cleansed." The woman vanished with their $140,000.

The victims told police they met Senora Monica at a swap meet or heard her advertisements on Spanish-language radio. She advertised that she could help with anything from palm reading to infertility.

The families turned over all their money for "cleansing" when Senora Monica told them the larger the sum, the greater discount she could give them. They were supposed to get it back Sunday night at the woman's storefront. Surprise! She never showed, and police say much of the information on the business license for the store is false.

They're trying to figure out who she is. She's described as Hispanic, 30 to 40 years old, 5 feet tall and 130 pounds, with long black hair.

Piracy Returns to the Open Seas Off Western Europe

Ship disappears after sail through English Channel

Aug 12 2009

(AP Photo/Pekka Laakso/Lehitukuva)

The cargo ship the Arctic Sea, a Maltese-flagged cargo ship, was supposed to make port in Algeria with a cargo of timber on August 4. As if by magic, more than a week later, there has been no sign of the ship or its Russian crew.

The mystery deepened when the ship reported it had been attacked off the coast of Sweden. But then, it apparently sailed unnoticed through the English Channel. Then it disappeared. Shades of Davy Jone's Locker.

Recently, there has been an outbreak of piracy off the coast of Western Africa, as rogue pirates from the virtually lawless nation of Somalia, have boarded ships of all descriptions and made off with millions of dollars of cargo being shipped around the world.

The mystery dates to late July, when 15 crew members of the Arctic Sea said they were tied up and beaten by a group of up to 10 men who boarded the ship off the Swedish island of Oland. The masked men identified themselves as police officers, but Swedish police said they hadn't been searching ships in that area.

The crew members then claimed the attackers had left the ship in a high-speed inflatable boat, without explanation.

On July 28, the Arctic Sea contacted British maritime authorities as it passed through the busy English Channel. The ship made a routine, mandatory report and apparently sailed through the Channel without incident. A spokesman for the British authority said the agency was very curious about what happened to the ship.

"It's bizarre," he said. "There is no coastguard I know who can remember anything like this happening."

Where the ship was next spotted is uncertain. Russian media reports say the last contact was on July 30 when the ship was in the Bay of Biscay, and that it was later spotted by a Portuguese patrol plane, but there was no contact.

But Portuguese Navy spokesman Commander Joao Barbosa said "we can guarantee that the ship is not in Portuguese waters nor did it ever pass through Portuguese waters."

Experts are very concerned about the vessel and crew, but at the same time are wary of attributing the disappearance to armed bandits.

Nick Davis, the chief executive of the Merchant Maritime Warfare Centre, told the BBC that if anything had happened to the ship, cargo would have been found. Davis found it more likely that the incident involved a commercial dispute between the owner and a third party and someone decided to resolve the matter privately.

At the time of writing this report the ship's disappearance remained a mystery.

Man With Diaper Fetish Feigns Physical/Mental Disability - Hires Woman from Craig's List to Change His Diapers

No Charges Laid in Bizarre Craigslist Scam; Police Say No Laws Broken

Providentia

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

A Central Florida woman has been told by police that there is nothing they can do in a bizarre case involving a man who hired her through Craigslist. Janet Schulte said that she answered a Craigslist advertisement seeking someone to care for an adult with severe disabilities. The man placing the ad described the patient as his "brother with diminished mental capacity". Although she never met the brother who placed the ad, she carried out all caregiving duties (including bottle-feeding and changing diapers) on her charge and was paid 600 dollars a month. Despite speaking to the "brother" on the phone, he avoided any direct meeting.

It was only after three months that Schulte, who had become suspicious due to behavioural changes in her patient and delinquent payments, discovered that she had been the victim of a scam. The man for whom she had been caring was actually feigning mental impairments and had placed the ad himself. According to Schulte, the man never "broke character" and played his role well. Despite going to police, Schulte and her husband have been told that no laws have been broken since she was paid for her services.

Fox Shot After Biting Another Fox

Fox shot after biting second fox on her buttocks

Aug 11 2009 08:10PM CDT

Police said an animal control officer shot and wounded a fox suspected of biting an attractive woman on the buttocks in southeastern Massachusetts. Officer Robert Stokinger said the first fox was shot and fled into the woods Monday. He said police officers who pursued the fox did not immediately find it.

The fox bit the woman's right butt cheek as she was waxing her car, wearing a bikini bathing suit, on Franklin Street in Whitman shortly after 3 p.m. Sunday. She was given a series of precautionary rabies shots by male attendants at the local hospital who drew straws to determine who got to give the shots.

Police said they suspect a single, sick fox is responsible for the daylight attack since they normally work at night, outside bars and dance halls.

Criminal Yawning Punished by Judge

Ill. man faces 6 months in jail for yawning


Do you recognize this man? He is armed and is considered dangerous. He was convicted and is going down and going to prison for the commission of a heinous crime. No such crime appears in the Illinois Criminal Statutes, but a Chicago judge just made it a crime by sentencing this man to six months in jail for yawning loudly in his court room.

Clifton Williams, 33, of Richton Park, is facing six months in jail for making what court documents call a yawn-like sound in Will County Judge Daniel Rozak's court last month. The yawn happened as Williams' cousin, Jason Mayfield, was being sentenced for a drug charge on July 23.

Rozak found Williams in contempt of court and sentenced him to six months in jail. However, Rozak could free Williams after a status hearing Thursday, if Williams apologizes and the judge accepts. By then, Williams will have served 21 days.

Witnesses disagree about whether Williams' yawn was out of line.

Charles Pelkie, spokesman for the Will County state's attorney's office, said the prosecutor in the courtroom at the time told him that what came out of Williams' mouth could hardly be called a "yawn."

"This was a very loud, boisterous, deliberate attempt on the part of this individual to disrupt the proceedings and show disrespect to the court," Pelkie said. "It was not a guy who involuntarily yawned. This guy was making a statement _ a very loud statement _ in court."

Mayfield disagreed, saying it was "not an outrageous yawn." Williams has written his family to say that he can't believe he's in jail "for nothing."

A message left for Rozak Tuesday was not immediately returned.

Six months is the maximum sentence judges can give for criminal contempt without a jury trial.

So much for free speech.

Chicago Hockey Star Involved in Beating of Cab Driver Over 20 Cent Fare Duspute

Attorney for beaten 62-year-old cabbie says case overblown

Aug 10 2009
Excerpted from story by RICK GANO - AP Sports Writer

One of the young stars of the resurgent Chicago Blackhawks hockey team, Patrick Kane _ the centerpiece of the team's marketing effort for the past two seasons _ is accused of teaming with his cousin to beat up a Buffalo, N.Y., cabbie over pocket change before daybreak Sunday.

Whether the incident will amount to much remains to be seen. Andrew LoTempio, an attorney for the cab driver, told WGN radio in Chicago on Monday that he thinks Sunday's incident was blown out of proportion.

"There was a dispute over the fee and it just kind of escalated from there," LoTempio told the station. "It was not really a robbery. That is probably a large distortion of what happened."

Asked if the case would end up as a felony, he said: "Absolutely not."

"I think we should be able to work things out," he added.

Kane is scheduled for a court hearing next Monday in a Buffalo courtroom. He has pleaded not guilty to felony robbery and misdemeanor counts of theft and criminal mischief. His cousin, James Kane, faces the same charges.

Next Monday is the same day a U.S. Olympic Men's Hockey orientation camp starts in suburban Chicago. USA Hockey spokesman Dave Fischer said Monday that Kane is still expected to participate in the three-day camp.

"We are aware of the incident. We don't condone or approve of what has been suggested the facts are. We are looking into it ourselves," NHL deputy commissioner Bill Daly said Monday.

Police say the cab driver was beaten because he did not have 20 cents in change to give Kane, the No. 1 overall pick in the 2007 draft and the NHL rookie of the year the following year. The 62-year-old cab driver, identified as Jan Radecki, said he was punched, grabbed by the throat and had his glasses broken.

His attorney said it is customary for some Buffalo cab drivers to lock the doors of their vehicles with the passengers inside _ if they think they might be stiffed on their fare.

"Early Sunday morning, Pat Kane was involved in an unfortunate situation with a cab driver in Buffalo," Kane's agent, Pat Brisson, said. "The cab driver's attorney in recent media reports was quoted as saying that the incident has been blown out of proportion. Kane has retained Paul Cambria as his attorney in this matter. Cambria has told me that, based on the evidence that he has reviewed in this case, there is no doubt that Mr. Kane will be fully exonerated.

"Since this is an ongoing legal matter, I think it is inappropriate for me to comment further at this time. But I am absolutely confident that, when the legal process has been completed, Pat Kane will be fully cleared."

After losing to the Red Wings in five games in the conference finals three months ago, the off-season for the Hawks has been uproarious. And Kane's arrest has been the most stunning episode of all.

Kane had 25 goals and 45 assists last season and had a hat trick in the victory that clinched the second-round playoff series against Vancouver. As a rookie, he had 21 goals and 51 assists.

Dead Infant Starts To Cry At Own Funeral

Baby declared dead heard crying at his wake

Aug 08 2009


A baby born 16 weeks prematurely and declared dead mystified doctors and stunned family members by crying at his own funeral.

The baby was born Friday in Paraguay and was quickly declared dead after doctors could not find a pulse or other vital signs. The family was issued a death certificate and a cardboard box to serve as a makeshift coffin.

When relatives returned home to prepare for the wake, they were shocked to hear the baby crying.

"I opened the box and took the baby out and he cried. I got scared and I said 'the baby's crying' ... and then he started moving his arms, his legs and I got scared, we got very scared," said one member of the family, Liliana Alvarenga.

At first, the hospital refused to believe the family, but soon admitted the baby, who is now in stable condition in the intensive care unit.

The family also says doctors first told them they had a baby girl, when in fact it turned out they had a baby boy.

The hospital has opened an investigation to determine if there was negligence on the part of the medical staff.

The investigation should take about 3 minutes, if done right.
___

Building Implosion Gone Sour

8/8/09

Turkish building imploders make miscalculation; building falls on its side, then uprights itself again.


In a startling display of incompetence contractors hired to demolish a building near the center of the town of Cankiri, by imploding the structure, misplaced the demolition charges. Instead of collapsing toward the center, the building tilted to one side where it hung precariously for a few seconds, fell on its side, then turned upright, with the top floor on the bottom.

Arab Horse Refuses to Yield Right-of-Way To Israeli Motorists.

Horse tramples car on Israeli highway
AP



Aug 5, 2009

JERUSALEM – An Arabian horse took to the highway and trampled an oncoming car in an encounter captured on video by a group of tourists in northern Israel. The tourists began filming when three horses came on the highway and began to canter alongside their car, but the scene took a bizarre turn when an oncoming car came on the scene.

The first two horses weaved out of the sedan's path, but the third took it head-on, smashing through its windshield with its hooves before leaping over it and continuing on its way.

The still picture above shows the impact while the video captured the entire sequence of events.

Israel's Channel 2 TV showed the video Tuesday and said the driver suffered minor cuts from smashed glass and the horse was lightly injured.

A passenger in the vehicle struck by the horse's hooves, who spoke only on condition of anonymity, said he believed the horse had been owned or trained by an anti-Semitic group. He pointed out that the first two horses had time to veer to avoid the oncoming car but the third horse continued straight ahead.

The Yellow Stream of Water Conservation

Video: Should You Pee in the Shower?
— By Sonja Sharp | Thu August 6, 2009 12:44 PM PST

There's a lot of things the Golden State will do to save water (including declaring a State of Emergency and virtually closing the water supply to the Central Valley) but pushing Californians to pee in the shower is NOT one of them.

"That's not something we've advocated, no," said Water Department spokesman Matt Knotley, who seemed shocked by the suggestion, apparently all the rage in Brazil, that folks should pee in the shower to save water. "If that's what they want to do in their country, fine. There are plenty of other ways that are very easy to save water."

Unfortunately, none of those have a cute Portugese PA video, like the one above. It's being used in Brazil to encourage Brazilians to pee in the shower as a means of conserving water. Turn up the volume and learn how to say pee in Portuguese.

Ultimately, all urban urine, whether from the bowl or the shower ends up being recycled after treatment in water treatment plants. And the U.S. astronauts have been drinking their own, treated and recycled urine since the beginning of space exploration.

In case you're still totally grossed out about the idea, you should know that this is not the first time we've approached water conservation through toilet humor. In the late 80s, when I was potty training, you could sum California's drought policy in a simple rhyme: If it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down.

Why Hot Dogs Cost $19.50 in NYC - And Don't Forget the $12.50 for a Coke. Chips Extra

NYC hot dog vendor evicted over whopping rent bill

Aug 08 2009


Homeowners aren't the only ones in hot water over overpriced real estate. A New York City hot dog vendor has been evicted from his prize spot outside the Metropolitan Museum of Art because he couldn't pay a whopping rent bill of nearly $54,000 a month.

Snack cart owner Pasang Sherpa of Queens had a deal with the city's parks department that required him to pay almost $643,000 per year for the vending rights near the museum steps.

He says he was $310,000 behind on his payments when he was evicted.

The Parks Department had auctioned off the rights to the spot last year.

___

Inmate Finds Novel Place To Hide Gun

Obese Texas inmate hides gun in his flabs of fat

Aug 08 2009


(AP Photo/Houston Police Department)

This image provided by the Houston Police Department shows George Vera, 25, in a booking photo. Vera is charged with possession of a firearm in a correctional facility. The 500-pound man was searched during his arrest and again at a city jail and the county jail, but officers never found the weapon, a 9mm pistol, in his rolls of skin. Vera admitted having the gun during a shower break at the county jail. When he finally told his jailer about the unloaded weapon he was charged with felony possession.

The Houston Chronicle reported Thursday that Vera was originally arrested on charges of selling illegal copies of compact discs. So it goes.

Poop to Spare - Iowa Man Donates Some of His Own to a Local Community Organization

Matthew J. Sodoma, who is not accused of sodomy despite his name, is accused of defecating on a sidewalk in Egin, Iowa. Observing the results of his labor and displeased with its effect, he picked up his own poop and smeared it on the door of a nearby community organization.

When accosted by police, Sodoma attempted to conceal any evidence of his involvement by shoving his hands into his pockets. Arresting officers ordered him to remove his hands from his pockets, to be cuffed. When Sodoma complied, he was ordered to put his hands back in his pockets until they reached the local jail.

The photos above depict Mr.Sodoma at the time he was booked into jail and 3 days later when he was released. Notice the change in appearance and demeanor after only 3 days in the Elgin jail's award winning rehabilitation program.

When asked what made Egin's prisoner rehab program so successful, Sheriff Doorstop said it was keeping things very simple: "You git rehabilitated or you git dead," he said.


Reported by Elgin Police Department

Florida Feline Downloads Child Porn - No Laws Prohibit It According to Cat's Owner - Cat Mum.

Fla. man blames cat's paws for child porn downloads

Aug 07 2009



Florida investigators say a man accused of downloading child pornography is blaming his cat. Keith Griffin of Jensen Beach is charged with 10 counts of possession of child pornography after detectives found more than 1,000 images on his home computer.

While acknowledging the presence of the prohibited photos on his computer, Griffin told investigators his male cat, Ferocious, stays home alone during the day while he is at work. He said the cat had been acting suspiciously for the past two months because he had previously scolded Ferocious for walking on the keyboard.

According to a sheriff's report Friday, Griffin told investigators that his cat jumped on the computer keyboard previously while he was downloading music. He said he had left the room and found "strange things" on his computer when he returned but did not give it much thought at the time.

Griffin said the material did not belong to him and the officers were free to take it with them. "Technically, it belongs to Ferocious and I am being wrongfully targeted by the police because I live here alone," said Griffin.

Griffin is being held on $250,000 bond in the Martin County jail. It is unclear if he has an attorney. Ferocious has not been charged with any crime because there are no laws currently prohibiting cats from possessing such photos.

Band of Idiots on the Loose in North America

Another Pranknet Child Molester

Texas online thug jailed for 2+ years for rape of five-year-oldd

AUGUST 6,09 Excerpted from The Smoking Gun

A creepy, loose knit group of psychopaths known as Pranknet have expanded their roster with the enrollment of another top tier psychopath from Texas, James Tyler Markle, who was convicted of raping a five-year-old girl after following her into the bathroom of a Texas church in Diboll, Texas.

Markle, 18, pleaded guilty to aggravated sexual assault of a child and was sentenced in 2005 to a minimum two years in custody. According to a source familiar with the case, Markle, a minor at the time, attacked the girl in September 2004 at the First Baptist Church in Diboll (Markle lives in the Texas city; the girl was visiting relatives there). When the child, who was attending Sunday services, got up to use the bathroom, Markle followed her into the room and sexually assaulted her. A source told TSG that Markle warned the girl that he would kill her parents if she did not comply with him. After the assault, he warned the girl not to tell anyone about the attack or her parents would hate her forever. According to Texas Youth Commission records, Markle was released from the Crockett State School, a youth detention facility, in December 2007 after serving about 30 months in custody.

Markle has committed an assortment of telephone pranks that have resulted in significant damage to U.S. businesses and is the subject of at least two criminal investigations. He could not be reached for comment. But in a story today in the Lufkin Daily News, Markle denied involvement in the Pranknet crimes, claiming that, "I'm a good person. I haven't done anything wrong. ... I don't go anywhere. All I do is go to church and home."

Markle has told others that as soon as his legal troubles blow over he intends to move to Los Angeles and act in films about child rape. "I'm new to Hollywood but I have a lot of experience in the genre," he told a reporter.

How to Carry $252 Worth of Grocery Items to Your Car in Only One Trip

Woman, 86, faces shoplifting charge in 61st arrest

Aug 06 2009


Authorities said an 86-year-old Chicago woman charged with shoplifting wrinkle cream and other items from a Chicago grocery store has been arrested 61 times since 1956. Ella Orko was arrested Sunday afternoon on the North Side after she allegedly stuffed $252 worth of groceries into her pants, including cosmetics, salmon, batteries and instant coffee.

She was charged with felony shoplifting.

Police said Orko has gone by as many as 20 aliases in the past.

An anonymous clerk said she became suspicious when she saw the woman stuffing a large, smoked salmon down the back of her pants. "Women should never put either salmon or tuna fish in their pants," said the anonymous clerk, whose name can be discovered by reading the police incident report which is available to the public.

Court records indicate that Orko has now been arrested 61 times and has 13 convictions for shoplifting.

She was arrested the first time in 1956 in Chicago for petty larceny and again in 1958 for grand larceny.

She's being held on $10,000 bail. It wasn't immediately clear who her lawyer is.

Holy Glacier Losing Its Sanctified Status

Swiss villagers formerly prayed for Glacier to stop advancing; now they pray it will stop shrinking - try to get the Pope to intervene

Aug 06 2009

By BRADLEY S. KLAPPER - Associated Press Writer


(AP Photo/Keystone, Laurent Gillieron)

In this Aug. 18, 2007 file photo two tourists look at the ice structure of the Aletschgletscher glacier near Bettmeralp in the canton of Valais, Switzerland. Villagers from the deeply Roman Catholic south Switzerland have for centuries been offering a sacred vow to God to protect them from the once-advancing ice mass of the Great Aletsch glacier.

Villagers from south Switzerland have for centuries offered a sacred vow to God to protect them from the advancing ice mass of the Great Aletsch glacier.

Global warming is making them want to reverse their prayers, and the Alpine faithful are seeking the permission of the pope.

Since the vow was established in 1678, the deal was simple: the citizens of the isolated mountain hamlets of Fiesch and Fieschertal would pledge to lead virtuous lives. In exchange, God would spare their homes and livelihoods from being swallowed by Europe's largest glacier as it expanded toward the valley with heavy winter snows.

Times have changed, and the once-fearsome Aletsch is melting amid temperatures that are 0.7 degrees Celsius (1.3 Fahrenheit) warmer than in the 19th century. The pastor at the Ernerwald Chapel has warned his flock that a new danger threatens.

"We all know _ and the Holy Father reminded us in his Easter message _ that an unprecedented change in the climate is taking place," Rev. Pascal Venetz said in his sermon to 100 people at the chapel, where until modern times pious women were prohibited from wearing colored underwear for fear of provoking the glacier.

"Glacier is ice, ice is water and water is life," Venetz said to the villagers from the Valais region, which has sent its sons to protect the Vatican as Swiss Guards since the 16th century. "Without the glacier the springs run dry and the brooks evaporate. Men and women face great danger. Alps and pastures vanish and towns die out."

The Aletsch was once seen as a threat because it could encroach on inhabited areas. These days, the glacier is more of a threat because of its melting ice, which risks worsening floods in the valley and, eventually, a loss of water supply. Experts say the glacier will continue to shrink _ even if temperatures stay at current levels _ because the warming of the last few decades has yet to take full effect.

In a telephone interview with The Associated Press, Venetz said many townsfolk have begun questioning the ancient vow that has been commemorated every year since 1862 in a procession to the chapel on July 31, St. Ignatius' feast day.

The idea to alter the vow came from Fiesch Mayor Herbert Volken, but the concern was not driven by worldly or secular impulses. Instead, the villages "were seeing nature change all around them," and realized the glacier might soon need saving, Venetz said.

Conservation body Pro Natura says the glacier base is receding up the mountain by about 100 feet (30 meters) a year. University of Zurich geographer Hanspeter Holzhauser estimates the river of ice has retreated 2.1 miles (3.4 kilometers) since peaking in 1860 at a length of 14 miles (23 kilometers). Nearly half of the shrinkage has happened since 1950.

Venetz said there were "countless, horrible natural catastrophes" in his parish from the 17th to the 19th centuries as the glacier expanded. "These led to the big volumes of water with floods that brought great damage and calamity in our villages," he said.

Villagers should continue with the vow, but the request for divine assistance should be adjusted to conform with the changing reality of nature, the pastor said.

"Praying should of course continue, because our villages should be spared from natural catastrophes," Venetz said in his sermon. "We should at the same time pray that our glacier does not melt any further, but instead grows, and that the most important thing in life _ water _ remains well preserved."

He said he would ask the local bishop to seek Pope Benedict XVI's permission to change the vow, and a statement from the cantonal (state) government of Valais said a papal audience was planned for September or October.

"At our next procession, we might just be able to pray against climate change, global warming and the receding of the glacier," Venetz said.