Greatest Bar Room Brawl, Ever

What began as a small, quiet family birthday and fish fry at a local bar in Toledo, Ohio, quickly broke down into a rampage, with hopped-up morons, on crystal meth, speed, and crack cocaine waging a pitched gun battle, inside the bar, outside the bar, from under a pool table in the bar, from behind the bar in the bar, and from the women's toilet.

Some of the women wore expensive frocks and some were dressed in tubular socks, but everybody was steaming hot when all the fun commenced. People were screaming and hollaring and jumpin' and yellin'; bottles were flying and the fish was smelling.

The people was having the time of their life, and Jim was jiving Jill, his wife, and over in the corner was a beat-up grand being played by a one-armed piano man. (He could only play bass, with his left arm.)Then way up above all the noise they made, somebody hollared, better get outta here Bub; this is a raid.

All of a sudden the lights went low, and everybody scrambled for one of the doors. But the MAN had 'em blocked from the front and the back and they was puttin''em in the wagon like potato sacks. They took 'em to jail in a dazed condition and booked each one of them on suspicion. My woman came down and went my bail and finally got me outta that stinkin'jail. And then, by then the joint was empty, with the lights all out and nobody in it. But the heads outside who by now were fried, were unconvinced and kept shootin' within it. Here's what it looked like:

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