Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Finally, Someone With a Wholesome, Natural Use for Lottery Winnings

Lotto winner wants to open a nude dude ranch

Apr 20 2009

Over the years you hear of lottery winners whose lives have been ruined by their inability to cope with new found riches. Some sqaunder it all; some hoard it and go on living the same as they always have. Some permit their children and grandchildren and deadbeat friends to squander it. A few donate generously to worthy causes such as children's hospitals and cancer research.

But very few have found a more socially redeeming, a more righteous, a healthier, freer and satisfying cause for their millions than Tod Witherspoon. Tod won a $4.6 million jackpot in 2004. Tod is not a city boy and longed to return to the farm life in which he grew up.

So Withspoon and Bobby Beaumont acquired a wooded, secluded farm/ranch where the two men and their friends can go for relaxation, riding horses and other soul mending activities. One of those activities is riding horses in the buff. That's right. Tod and Bobby and their friends, about half of whom are female, like to drop all their restrictive clothing and get in the saddle, in the raw.

But Tod and Bobby want even more people to enjoy their bounty and lifestyle, so they decided to open a nude dude ranch. Urban women and men, married couples, unmarried couples, gay couples, and even singles could come for a weekend, a week, a month and get in touch with nature, with others having similar desires and wants, and all on a low clothing allowance budget. Birthday suits are about as formal as you could get, although their planned ranch would be billed as clothing optional.

The percentage of guests who visit a clothing optional establishment to show off their new frocks from Bergdorfs or the new Armani suit is minimal. They are there to examine the latest offerings in men's and women's nude body adormments, such as nipple rings, nose diamonds, and pubic hair styles.

But Tod and Bobby soon leared they have two big problems _ local zoning laws and a nudity ban in Flaquesito County. The locals, mainly southern Baptists and Pentacostals are not noted for their tolerance of the nude body so the public hearings on their application could get a bit rowdy.

Tod says they'll try to get the necessary paperwork, but if they can't get approval he'll close the BT Ranch again to all but friends. Tod and Bobby have lots of those.

Though their Web site says clothing is optional, there is a caveat: Everyone "must wear pants and boots." "We have to think about the horses, too.' said a resplendently naked Bobby. "A few of them are a little shy."

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