Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Yes, It's Florida Again - Kook Capital of America

Meet Mitchell Tice.

The beaming Florida Keys man, 40, was arrested last night and charged with stealing a box of sex toys.

Tice, a breakfast cook, swiped the items in January after breaking into a utility trailer owned by a couple for whom he then worked. Tice also allegedly pinched two laptop computers and a wig, according to a Monroe County Sheriff’s Office report excerpted here.

Tice was linked to the theft after his girlfriend, Pshantel Scott, told detectives that her beau “had placed a bag of dildo’s (sex toys) under their bed.” Scott, 38, added that Tice told her he stole the sex toys “from his boss’s trailer.” He planned to use them and then advertise them on Craig's list.

Pshantel apparently objected to the use of the used dildos on herself, claiming she deserved new sex toys, not sleazy, used dildos.

Scott turned over to police the hot items, which “were placed into property.” The sex toys were later shown to the restaurant owners, who “positively identified the items as theirs.”

The owners were overjoyed to retrieve their collection of sex toys and said they had missed them as their sex life deteriorated into mundane sex acts that were boring.

As news of the bust and the restaurant owners' activities spread, business at the restaurant was markedly off. At least one former restaurant patron was concerned about what he might find in his soup.

Charged with felony burglary and two misdemeanor counts, Tice is being held in lieu of $4000 bond at a county lockup.

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