Masturbating Mom Needs Privacy

Topless Woman Masturbating In Van Arrested On Gun Charge

A topless woman who was masturbating in a hotel parking lot is facing a weapons charge after Illinois cops investigating her auto eroticism discovered a loaded pistol in her vehicle.

A Naperville cop responding to an unrelated call spotted Vikki Myers, 44, in a van outside the Red Roof Inn. After initially claiming that she was changing clothes, Myers admitted to pleasuring herself in the vehicle, according to police.

That admission may have been prompted by a police officer’s discovery of what an officer described as “adult items that were used for self-pleasuring,”e.g., dildos.

In addition to copping to the vehicular masturbation,(is masturbating in your own parked vehicle at night in the parking lot of your temporary home, a hotel, a crime in Illinois?) Myers told cops that there was a loaded 9mm Sig Sauer handgun in the car, a weapon for which she did not have a state-issued Firearm Owners Identification card. Myers, pictured in the above mug shot, was charged with unlawful possession of a firearm.

It was not immediately clear why the woman had to remove her top to effectuate the self-pleasuring. That's what attracted the attention of the cop, himself an apparent voyeur, against whom Ms. Myers should prefer charges.

Additionally, lacking probable cause, the search of Meyers' vehicle was an illegal search and the discovery of the sexual implements and the handgun should be suppressed as the "fruit of the poisoned tree." 20+ years post Miranda and the cops still can't get it right?

It appears that Myers, who was staying at the hotel with her three children, had repaired to her 2002 Chrysler van for some alone time. And when you are a single mom, on the road all day with 3 children that's not a crime.